The Papier-mâché Pavilion

 By popular demand, may I present the ill advised - and slightly OTT - papier-mâché Danish Pavilion originally displayed at the Exposition Universelle of 1900 in Paris, then moved to the village of Overstrand, Norfolk (England):

 

I think this must be taken from near the cliff edge as that rise behind the pavilion (with the path going up it on the right) looks like it coudl be Toll's Hill.  Unless this was taken from Paul's Lane which would mean that rise was the cliffs (which have since fallen into the sea).

[photo from Overstrand Parish Council website]

A Colourful Effort at Timekeeping

Well, I did warn you (kind of) in the last post.  Although I am a couple of days early...

Timekeeping

 

We know our Starfleet crews get themselves into all sorts of temporal scrapes, but how do they (and other galactic citizens) tell the time wherever they are?  Apart from stardates, the odd PADD/viewscreen display, Sisko's Saltah'na clock, and a couple of "antique" 20th century watches, what do contemporary timepieces look like in the Star Trek time periods?  Especially those from worlds other than Earth?  After all, not everywhere has a 24 hour day...

 Timekeeping was a theme I suggested back in March 2023, and it finally got the votes it needed last month to become this month's Fan Art Challenge.

 I can't remember what my original thoughts/ideas for this theme were, so I came up with something new: a poster for the Star Trek: Lower Decks first season episode "Temporal Edict".

 

 I began by looking at time travel film posters.  Many of them feature someone or someones in front of a circular background somethingorother - usually a clock face or something similar.  One of them in particular caught my eye: The Adam Project.  I liked the layout - and Ryan Reynolds! - so decided to use it as the basis for my poster.

An Argument of Witches

 Well, it has been 19 years since that fateful day 19 years ago...

Did Witchface mean to say "19" twice?

Who cares.  Just let them get on with it otherwise we'll be here all night.

 As I recall, our very first post did not have a title - that came later.  As did the eye.  No, not the one on the Sideboard (although that one did come later, too), the tiny, blue, glowy thing in the 19 year old post.

The Eye

 As blog beginnings go, it could have been a little more spectacular, I suppose.  Having said that, I'm glad it didn't happen like this.  At least, I don't think that's how it started?

 Didn't it?

 I don't know, I was asking you!

 My mind has blocked out the traumatic incident that led to you and your bloody SubC taking up residence in it, thankfully.

Hey!

 Yes: Hey!  And, traumatic?!  I hardly think it was traumatic.  In fact, I'm sure it was wonderful!  You should be grateful I arrived to instill a bit of pizzazz into your life because you certainly weren't doing anything with it.

 "Pizzazz"?  Christ.  No one says pizzazz anymore.

 Oh, pish posh.  Anyway, it's a good job I did turn up - just think how lucky you are that this isn't going to happen now.

 That happened because of you, you silly witch!

Yeah!

 You're the one that cuts the toenails, so it's clearly your fault. 

 If you hadn't been in me then you wouldn't have been summonsed to the future and my great-to-the-power-of-six (or is it seven?) nephew wouldn't have had to travel back in time to stop it from happening!

*Ahem*  We're getting somewhat off topic, here.

What exactly is the topic again?

Who knows?  Some sort of half-arsed anniversary malarkey, I guess.

Well, it's certainly half-arsed.  The time would have been better spent

visiting everyone else's blogs and replying to previous posts' comments.

 That will have to wait until tomorrow as we're in the middle of an argument now!

EDIT: 16:55 10/10/2024

Jon has already provided the link to a similarly themed choon in the comments, so here's a little something else for this post's soundtrack - Donovan and "Season of the Witch"

This Weekend, I Am Mostly Dressing Casual

 

Empire Of The Sun - "Cherry Blossom"

 

Empire Of The Sun - "Music On The Radio"

 

Thank you Jon for the idea (and for the post title).  And I've just realised that this could also do rather well as "I Think Today Should Be A Say Something Hat Day!"

 

P. S. Why don't we have some of this while we're at it, too:

Stella Botanica

 Have you ever wondered how all those starships and spacecraft in the Star Trek Universe are made?  Well, wonder no longer as I have discovered evidence that is sure to surprise you.  The starships are not painstakingly fabricated on a planet or in orbit, but rather their parts are sustainably harvested from the giant machine lifeforms that grow in the Lightspeed Lagoon Nebula as the following illustration shows:

This botanical illustration must have found its way back in time somehow for me to have discovered it 250 years before it was created.

I know.  Shocking, to say the least!

- - -

Tunes on Tuesday Turns Back Time

 I half prepared this post as filler, thinking that I probably wouldn't publish anything until next weekend, but then I went and managed the previous Early Start post and never finished this one (which was inspired by some of the songs a work colleague plays first thing in the morning before the phone lines are switched on)!

 Fortunately, no further musings from me are necessary - I can just let the music play:

Aqua: Turn Back Time

Sydney Youngblood: If Only I Could

Shakespears Sister: You're History

Propaganda: Duel

Bass-O-Matic: Fascinating Rhythm

ABBA: Cassandra

Erasure: Drama!

Wet Shags with Old Groynes

 Oh, there's so much to do and yet so little time!

 Where has the year gone?  And why do I have the feeling that something important is coming up?

Well, why don't you look at the calendar, you dolt?!

Rude!

 But what a splendid idea:

 Ah, just in time!  Allowing for time zones and other time travel-related nonsense, while still the 22nd here, it is the 23rd in Queensland so: Happy birthday, Dinahmow!

 And in a couple of days time, it will be Mistress Maddie's turn on the birthday merry-go-round!

oOo

M A G N O L I A

Big Pink Tree!  (Cherry, not Magnolia)

 In the previous post, Mistress Maddie waxed lyrical about Magnolia trees and was surprised to learn that we have them here across the pond.  Well, after I'd finished replying to the comments, I went out for a quick walk around the village (also inspired by a Maddie comment from the last post in March) to get a snap of the Main Road's Magnificent Magnolia.

 Unfortunately, the poor thing doesn't look half as magnificent as last year, as - in its exposed position - almost all of the flowers have been frost and wind-burned.

CCQ: An Enterprising Ending (at last)

 "You silly sods!"  Hound was quite cross.  "Now look what you've done."

 "What happened?  How did we get here?" a bewildered Mago asked.

 "Someone - or possibly sometwo - were thinking of Star Trek when they crashed through my hedge, weren't they?"

 Ms Scarlet guiltily put a hand to her basket-weave bouffant while the grin dissolved from IDV's face.

 "Yes, but really?" The disbelief in Maddie's tone was palpable.

 "Yes, really" said Hound.  "I'm a hedgewitch.  For me the hedge is both the witch's setting and a gateway to other places.  Mitzi's hedge was still charged up from when I transported us to the Cornish coast for the Poldark thing, so blundering through it while thinking of Trek brought us here."

 "My hedge did this?" Mitzi didn't look happy.  "Right.  It's coming down once we get back."

 "Oh, I'm no good with this Star Trek stuff" Dinah cut in.  "Let's just go back through so we can all go home.  I'm tired - I'm several time zones from where I normally am and it's all catching up with me."

 "Several time zones?"  IDV whispered, nudging Ms Scarlet for attention as he gestured at their surroundings.  "And the other 250 years!"

 "Oh, Mr Devine!"

 "Oof!" said Dinah as she found herself face down on the other side of the hedge.  

 "Well, that didn't work."  Mago helped Dinah up after her unsuccessful return trip.

 "All the magic was used up getting you all here" Hound said.  "We're not going anywhere for a while."

 "Will you lot stop trampling my plants!" a loud voice cut through the Blogorati's sniping.  "And get off my lawn!"

 As one, the Blogorati turned towards the source of their berator.  There in the corner, shovelling a big pile of something ghastly-looking, was someone familiar wearing a red miniskirt uniform like Ms Scarlet's.

 "Ms Nations?"

 "Stop your gawping, IDV" she said.  "This tribble shit isn't going to spread itself."

 Oh.  Er, no.  I suppose it won't.  Um.  Actually, our shift's about to start - we'd better go"  IDV shooed the milling Blogorati towards the turbolift.  "C'mon, let's get out of here."

 "Suit yourselves" Ms Nations muttered to their backs as they walked off.  "I'll just get my garden hoes to do it.  Boys!" she yelled.  As the turbolift doors closed on the Blogorati, two muscular non-coms dressed in not very much appeared.  Several pairs of widening eyes were treated not to bulging, hot, sweaty manual labour¹, but to the doors snapping shut. 

oOo

Isn't It Drafty In Here?!

 It was while dragging a draft post about books into 2021 and getting it fit to be published, that I noticed that there were 1300 posts on this blog.  But, upon closer inspection, 16 of them were drafts, so it'll be at least a couple of months before I hit that nice, round 1300 published posts.

 I pondered deleting the drafts as some of them are bloody ancient, but I thought I might actually finish them off one day and publish them.  Then I got to wondering if anyone else has a load of half-finished (or less) posts languishing in their "drafts" folder.  So, do you?  If I show you mine, will you show me yours?  I hope so, because here are mine:

 Out of these first five, I'd just about managed to get "Books" in some sort of order, but I've ruined it with some questionable font/size choices, so that's going to take some unravelling.  Then, I'm preparing for this years "Coven Awards" as I had an idea for a revamp which means taking note of things as they happen, rather than trying to remember stuff in a panic half-way through December.  There's also some preparation for a trip over the Cusp for "Ms Scarlet's Birthday" in March - but the rest of that post depends on whether we get this pandemic under control and the Cusp opens its borders.  Obviously, "Isn't It Drafty In Here" is this post, which just leaves "It's a Faake! prose" - which I will probably delete it as it's only a half-arsed Star Trek story that, despite the Jan 3 date, has actually been hanging around since at least Feb 2019 (which is the penultimate time that I edited it).  The only reason it's still hangning around is that I've been using it to upload images to my Blogger gallery, and Jan 3rd was the last time I did that...

That Old Back Passage Called Love

 Madam Arcati's latest Delargo Gardens post once again had me reminiscing about the tight, jungly confines of my own Back Passage when I lived in Norwich twenty-odd years ago.  So much so, in fact, that I found myself trawling through reams of old pictures on a USB stick trying to find some photos.

 Well, I did find some, and rather than let all that time and effort go to waste, I thought I'd pop a selection of them up here (because I have nothing else prepared or even remotely ready in draft).  I also searched through my dusty old blog crypt for ancient posts that featured the original Castle DeVice's tiny garden.  Although I lived in Castle DeVice from the back half of 1998 to early 2009, I can only find photos from 2006 onwards (I think that this must have been the time I discovered digital photography)...

 While you explore my back passage, why not listen to Ella Fitzgerald singing about it (she misheard "Back Passage" as "Black Magic", but she is getting on a bit...):

Note: I spent ages getting all the photos in date order, from August 2006 to December 2008.  Then, as soon as I viewed them all together, I realised that they'd look better in month/season order to show the progression of growth, so that's how I've displayed them here.

Late April (2008) - Left: Halfway down my back passage and nearing my back door, an avocado tree (grown from a pit), arum lily (Zantedeschia aethiopica), various ferns, a hanging basket in need of a good sort out, and some bamboo.  

Middle: Just inside the entrance to my back passage are a couple of New Zealand flaxes (Phormium somesuch), heuchera, a tufty old bit of blue-green grass, and some daffs.  

Right: The paysho - or staging area to my back passage - repleat with a potted box (Buxus), rose, bluebells, geranium, daffs, scylla, and violas.

There's Nothing On But Repeats

 As Ms Scarlet seems to have much success with repeats of old blog posts, I thought I'd give it a go, too.  I had found a couple of rather old, explosive posts, but the return of Beast and Tim brought something else to mind: a trip over the Cusp starring none other than the two Blogorati of yore:

Witches Getting on Beast's Wick

(first seen nearly ten years ago for Beast's birthday)

 It didn't take long for the blood to stop rushing to his brain and the almost overwhelming nausea and vertigo to fade.  As the gold and blue fireworks cleared and his vision returned, he noticed the vast expanse of reeds around him and a distant mansion at the end of a sweeping gravel driveway.

 There were voices, too, in mid-conversation:
 "Of course, I wouldn't know a snowy egret if I were pissing on one. Lunch?"
 "I think it's a little late in the season."
 "For lunch?"
 "No, pissing on birds."
 There was a pause which was when he realised that the two, very familiar, conversationalists were staring at him.  Quickly taking in his surroundings, adding two and two together and resignedly coming up with four, he despaired and his shoulders fell.

  Oh, no, Beast thought to himself.  Oh, please no.   Outwardly, he sighed at the realisation that he'd been dragged over the Cusp again without so much as a by your leave.  It was his bloody day off from Cafe C and here he was, over the bloody Cusp in bloody Eastwick, dressed as bloody Fidel to do the bloody bidding of Tim bloody 'Van Horne' and 'Alexandra' bloody DeVice.  Plus the rest of the bloody Coven, no doubt.  If he'd surmised correctly, they were at the point in the story where Van Horne had invited Alex for lunch - read: banquet - which he, as Fidel, was to prepare.  Bloody.  Hell.
 And to make matters worse, this was yet another non-speaking part.  And on his birthday too!
 By this time, the stares had turned into baleful gimlet glares with no small amount of contempt evident.  Nodding submissively at Tim's unspoken order for an elaborate lunch with which to woo IDV, Beast's shoulders slumped even more as he trudged off towards the mansion kitchens.

Sleeping With the Enemy

  Oof!  Here I am!

  Apologies for taking off without leaving a note.  I thought I had, but by the time I realised I hadn't it was too late to go back in time to ensure that I had because there isn't one now.  And there would be one if there had been time.  Which there wasn't, otherwise I wouldn't be telling you this.

  Anyway...  Back to the post at hand.

  Despite what the title implies-

I think the Host came up with it?

  Don't look at me!

Well, your irritating little SubC, then.

How very dare y-  Oh.  Actually, it was me.

  Anyway...  Despite what the title implies - whoever came up with it - I was not sleeping with the enemy.  I was sleeping with the Monster Under the Bed.*  Well, not in that sense - I was on top. 
  Which makes it sound like I was sleeping with it in that way.  I wasn't.  By "on top" I mean I was on the bed, while the monster was under it, as is traditional in these matters.
  Anyway, its gone now.  I managed to get it on the NightShip a couple of evenings ago.  I've been clearing up the drool and half-eaten carcasses from under my bed ever since, which is partly why I haven't been around lately.

The Monster Under the Bed
Awwww... Just look at its cute little chitinous claws, and those adorable, puppy-dog-eating eyes!

::

  Plus, I have been caught in a downpour of ideas, so it may be another a few days before I shake them all off and pin them down.  They're mostly Star Trek ideas, so nothing you'd be interested in, I'm sure.
  Although, there is that Panto to see to...


* A refugee from Hallowe'en...

September Has Spiralled Away

I know!  I'm just as shocked as you are,

broken-stone-Cyberman-mask-in-the-sand.

Time is certainly flying by...

 I popped down to the beach for a swim on the 22nd, but the sea was too choppy, so I mooched about on the shoreline, picking up pretty stones and the like, instead.  As the sundials I'd previously created* had been washed away (or swiped aside by seagulls/children/Chronosfear/League Against Time-telling Equipment et al), I thought about making more, but stopped in my tracks when I realised that in sorting the stones, I'd created a rather pleasing spiral.
 So I carried on until the groyne post was packed with stones!

Ye Olde TV

 I am somewhat exhausted after chronicling our recent escapades over the Cusp (see previous six posts), as well as dealing with various family issues (medical emergencies, transportation, and taking on the 'School Run Mum' role, amongst other things - and all seem to have occurred on the hot, sunny days, leaving me with the overcast, windy and rainy days) so I have been watching TV in between the fetching and carrying.
 Mostly, I have been rewatching old things, or old things made new.  It's been a bit like comfort eating.  Which I have also been doing a lot of...

 Anyway, on with the shows!

Smack the Pony - a comedy sketch show from 1999 to 2003 performed by Fiona Allen, Doon Mackichan, and Sally Phillips.  It also featured Sarah Alexander, Darren Boyd, and Cavan Clerkin.

(Three of my favourite sketches can be found at 8:19 "Competitive singing", 10:40 "Window Cleaner", and 22:50 "Competitive make-up")

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine - selected episodes from 1993 to 1994, including the first season finale In the Hands of the Prophets, and the season two opening trilogy The Homecoming, The Circle, and The Seige.  A couple of Cardassian-centric episodes Cardassians and Tribunal, and the shocking season two finale, The Jem'Hadar.

The Emerald Elf Shorts

Continued from It's just a jump to the left...

* C L U M P *

 "Oof!"  I said.  Which was qute restrained really considering that a sizeable house had landed on me.
 After some wriggling and a lot of splinters, I managed to free my right arm from broken joists, floorboards and the like, and reach up under Hat's brim and into its hammerspace.  On only the seventeenth attempt, I felt the sturdy handle of a drill in my grip and - wasting no time - switched it on while driving it upwards.

 After what felt like hours - but was probably only six years - hot, sticky, covered in sawdust and grit, I burst through the bottom of a bathtub.
 Reality dawned...
 "Oh, no" I said to no one in particular as I clocked what I was wearing and realised what what was transpiring.  "No.  I'm sorry.  No.  This cannot happen.  I don't want this."
STAND BY FOR INSERTION INTO STORYLINE the disembodied voice of the enchanted mirror intoned.

What?  What mirror?

 "What?"

What mirror?  Where did it come from?

 "I don't kn-"
STAND BY...
 "What?  No.  I'm sorry, no.  I'm not having it.  We can do better than this."  
STAND BY...
 I couldn't believe the bloody mirror, or whatever it was, wasn't listening to me.  Me!  A witch!  There was only one thing for it.  I had to bamboozle it.  A spell came to mind, so I vomited it out of my mouth before it bamboozled me, too.
 "The fact is" I said, quoting Nana Rampton's Discombobulator "this is about identifying what we do most of best, and finding fewer ways of doing more of it less."
...?  The mirror managed to convey an uncomfortable silence before clicking and whirring rather disconcertingly.  REINITIALISING it finally declared.
 "At last" I muttered.
 "G'day, DeVice!  We're good to go" the mirror said in a non-bogan Aussie accent.
 "What?"
 "Don't say what, say pardon" the mirror said, this time attempting a middle class English accent that would take offence at being told one's gravy needed sieving, but failing to completely mask the Aussieness.  I narrowed my eyes as comprehension dawned.
 "T-Bird?  Is that you?"
 "None other" the one-time teeterer atop the Hag Pillar confirmed amidst more whirring, clicking background noise.  She'd dropped the posh Home Counties accent, thankfully.  "OK, mate.  We're pretty much good to go.  Again."

What?!  We're accepting cameos from the Days of Coven Past now?

Just go with it, or this will take even longer.  The end is already beyond our second and third sight, and the crystal ball's given up trying to extrapolate where and when this "adventure" will end up.

Yes, but, Miss Smuggersham?  T-Bird?!  We haven't seen her in years!

I don't see why not?  She was a major player back in the day.  Besides, Beast turns up here later.

WHAT?!?

REINITIALISATION COMPLETE.  STORY CHANGE IN THREE...

 "Right" said T-Bird, leaving the mirror to get on with the technical stuff.  "Now to see how Tim's getting on in those Big Bang Pants!"
TWO...
 "Sexily, I'll bet!" I said not even bothering to hide the lasciviousness.
ONE...
 "Rawr!"

Hang on.  This isn't going to involve more time travel is it?  You know I'm not thrilled abou-

* C L U M P *

"Ow!"

And so it begins

Again...

It's just a jump to the left...

Hmmm... I think I'll take the scenic route instead

That's a strange looking newt.

Bloody seagulls!

'Dialled Up To Eleven

My first sundial at 10:42

 It has been over a week since my last post, and over three weeks since I brought back some photos from the beach, so it's about time I remedied that.  And what better remedy than a besundialed groyne?!
 With today being one of those rare Thursdays where plans haven't been made for me, I found myself down on the beach (after I'd hung the washing out, of course) hoping for a swim.

End-of-the-Line

GROYNE!

 Due to a combination of a cool wind, only very intermittant sunshine, and people, the swim didn't materialise, but I did find something else to do...

It's A Faaaake! Not The Art Of Star Trek - Blue Food

 After my Klingon Drag Queen tied for first place in last month's Star Trek Art Challenge, I had some vague thoughts about a food-related theme which I shared with the other winner.
 "Food related sounds very intriguing" s/he said "there are lots of possibilities. Food has been important in all Trek series. Kingon Gagh, Romulan Ale, Tilly making snarky comments at the passive aggressive food slots... there's no shortage of scope."
 "All I can think of now", I replied, "is Tilly muttering 'Shut your food slot' in the manner of Scotty's 'Up your shaft!' to the Excelsior's turbolift in Star Trek III: The Search For Spock.
 "If we do go for the food theme, shall we leave it quite open, such as food from any Star Trek era or race to give it that wide scope you mentioned?"
 "I think keeping it broad would be a good idea, yes. From Aldebaran Whiskey to Zylo Eggs: Food in the Star Trek Universe!
  "I found this page which could be useful, if people want some idea prompts: https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Foods_and_beverages"

 So, with that in mind: It's dinner time!

This month's Art Challenge we're exploring the food (glorious food!) of the Star Trek Universe. There's a whole galaxy of possibilities on this one, from figuring out what might be on the drinks menu at Quark's, to recreating Will Riker's terrible omlettes!

As long as there is a Star Trek connection of some kind, I'm happy to see where people's creativity takes them.

 And that creativity took me here (as if you hadn't already suspected, what with the last post's Sperm Whale Plastique à la Bleu):

 Below is a screenshot from the infamous blue food scene in Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country which directly inspired my efforts (as well as Delilah Smythe's).

All The Queen's Horses...

 Oh my Christing gods!  I've just discovered that Siobhan and Marcy are back!  Shakespears Sister rides again!!!

New single, All The Queen's Horses

I love all the call-backs to their previous videos (some of which can be seen below)

Here's a recent interview


And now, how about some of their classics: