Sunday, April 23, 2017

Messy Maths

 I've just heard from The Mother that after Indescribable, The Little Witch and Babyzooky came to visit us over Easter, they went to see Indescribable's husband's family. And guess what? Both of his brothers along with a couple of others (wives? children? other family members? - I wasn't paying attention) got the two bob bits!
Thankfully, I don't have any
photos of her other end!
 Indescribable mentioned that Babyzooky had been off her food for a few days and had produced some astoundingly messy nappies (diapers).
 Two and two were put together and the resulting four looks an awful lot like that toxic little scumdrop, Babyzooky, was almost certainly the cause of our Game of Porcelain Thrones over Easter. She is Patient Zero. Our own little Typhoid Mary.
 Indescribable is so proud!

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Garden Photos Event preview

  Somewhat coincidentally, I've just been out in the gardens of Castlette DeVice taking some photos of some of the blooms and new growth, and what do I find upon opening up the blog to deposit them all in? A timely reminder from The Very Mistress for all of us Infomaniac Bitches to prepare for her Seventh Annual Garden Photos Event!

  Well, without further ado, may I present a much more comprehensive (and better, in my opinion) selection of triffids and such than the last lot.  And, may I say, the ferns are not quite as scary/vulgar-looking as Dinahmow's cyclone-surviving ferns...

Gorgeous new growth colour from a fern behind the lake pond, in the shady area. The name of which I don't know because I couldn't be bothered to bend down and look at the label.

Another fern at the back of the garden. This one I appropriated from the woods behind the Castlette a couple of years ago.

Monday, April 17, 2017

Game of Porcelain Thrones

 Oog.  There's a reason I haven't been around much this Easter: Food poisoning!


 On Thursday, Inexcuseable and I prepared a birthday tea for The Father (it was his birthday on Wednesday, but we were both at work late on the day). It was a bit of a rush job, as I was out with Indescribable all afternoon house hunting (some of the larger ones can get up quite a clip, and the smaller ones are a bugger for finding once they've gone to ground) - she's looking for a place up here on the coast as she's got a new job. 
 When we got back to Castlette DeVice, I bunged a load of potatoes in the oven to bake, then set about decorating the cake I'd made that morning. Meanwhile, Indescribable returned to The Parents' to collect them, The Little Witch (née Babyzilla) and Babyzooky. Inexcuseable then arrived to sort out all the trappings to go with the potatoes (cheese, tuna, salad etc.) and try and wake her husband (who'd been at work since ridiculous-o'clock and, upon returning, immediately fell into a sleep deep enough to inspire a maleficent fairy spurned from a royal christening, or something).

The view west from the clifftop at Trimingham - That's Sidestrand in the distance. Indescribable and I looked at a couple of houses near here.

Mind your step!

Thursday, April 13, 2017

Snippets from the garden

  While I'm waiting for that infernal washing machine to eat another of my socks, I thought I'd have a look at the photos I took of the garden at the weekend. I obviously wasn't paying attention to my pointing and clicking as they were a mess, and with terrible composition and lighting. Certainly not fit for human consumption.
  So, after an awful lot of cropping, I was left with these:

Beautiful red tulips. I'm not a fan of tulips but I do quite like these.

Primulas in the shady patch behind the lake pond.

Sunday, April 09, 2017

"Quickly Brad, there are thousands of lives at stake..."

... On second thoughts, they're only Redshirts.

Who knew Richard Dreyfuss could be so callous?

[Original Close Encounters poster via]

Saturday, April 08, 2017

Twisted Gulls and Groynes

  So. I've been whittling the rest of my photos from Thursday's beach walk down for a while, and the following are those that I'm vaguely satisfied with.
  As you can see, Camera loves a groyne or two (don't we all?) - even the bent ones!

This is the view east towards Sidestrand from the Overstrand beach by the Coast Road promenade...

... and the view back west, having walked a little way

A groyne with a wet end

Thursday, April 06, 2017

Flotsam and Jet Sharks

  Well, perhaps not an actual jet-propelled shark, but it made you look, didn't it?!

A smallspotted catshark. Maybe?
  A surprisingly warm and sunny morning had me yearning for a beach walk to make up for the disappointly overcast one last weekend. In a moment of ibuprofen-fuelled charity*, I rang The Mother and asked if both she and The Father would like to come with me.

  They said "Yes".


  As it happens, they only made it as far as the third groyne before they'd had enough, and went back for a cup of coffee at the Cliff Top Cafe, leaving me to soldier on alone.


Jets. Not Jet-sharks. Unless...

Saturday, April 01, 2017

Not a Shag to be had

 Poor Dinahmow has been subjected to Goldfrapp and Redshirts, but all she wants is a shag on a groyne.

 It's not too much to ask, surely?

 Well, apparently it is. 

 I popped down to the seafront this morning to find only the barest glimpses of groynes and definitely no shags.

 Or cormorants.

Friday, March 31, 2017

"Life, uh, finds a way..."

... except if you're a Redshirt.

Who knew that Jeff Goldblum could be wrong?

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Moon In Your Mouth


  Goldfrapp's new album Silver Eye is out on Friday!!!

  Here's the single "Anymore":

  And here's "Moon In Your Mouth" - no video yet, just the song:

  Happiness abounds!!!

Monday, March 27, 2017

Of Commas and Contrails

  During a busy weekend, I managed to escape certain necessities for an hour and get some fresh air. Amongst all that air were these: 

A lone buzzard circling over the scrub across the road from Castlette DeVice

A comma butterfly basking in the sun - Yes, we had warm sunshine yesterday with more due for the rest of this week!

Wednesday, March 22, 2017


Beaky feeding a young Redshirt
  Despite it being just an ordinary day of little consequence, chores still need doing, things still need to be done, and plants, pets and other lifeforms still need to be fed, watered, and the like. 

 A little over a month ago, just after Tim's triumphant half-arsed return to blogging, we reluctantly agreed to look after his minions Army of Darkness, as he clearly couldn't be bothered with them anymore. 
And it's a good job we did, as he hasn't been seen since!
  Yes. Castlette Device and its modest estate is now home to some of the prettiest-
 And stupidest!
  And stupidest cannon fodder ever to grace the small screen: Redshirts!

Saturday, March 18, 2017


  Eeeek! I'm falling behind! March is already halfway through and I'm still languishing here as if I've not got through the second week yet! I mean, this time last year, I'd bored you with yet another set of photographs from drifting around the North Norfolk countryside, with a further batch hot lukewarm on their tails. And what have I got? Nothing.

  Nothing except for a short list of books that I've read since the last book update.
 Yeah, and you're behind on them too, as you didn't publish a book post in February!
Because he hadn't finished enough to warrant a post. Lazy sod.
  Hey! I've been busy with other things.
  How dare you! That orb and gown were veritable masterpieces! Plus, they were very well received.
 Ha! How much did you have to pay the reviewers?
  Right. That's enough from you. Why don't you two go and plan our next jaunt over the Cusp?
And, preferably get lost there!
  That'd be nice... Anyway: Books. After all the excitement of looking at other peoples bookcases, actually reading the books has been a bit of a slog (except for the always delightful Trillions). Here's what I've read since January:

6. Headlong Flight (Star Trek: The Next Generation), by Dayton Ward

7. Trillions, by Nicholas Fisk

8. The Deep Range, by Arthur C. Clarke

9. A Fall of Moondust, by Arthur C. Clarke

10. The Long Mirage (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine), by David R. George III


  That's it for now. I'm going out for a walk while the sun's out. Then I might make a start on this month's Star Trek Art Challenge. Maybe...

  See you later!

A boat I saw last weekend.
Posted here for no reason other than there's nowhere else for it to go.

Sunday, March 12, 2017

Nothing you haven't seen before...

  Yes. Yet more photos from Sidestrand, Overstrand, and Cromer beaches. The ones I kind of threatened you with last weekend.

Here we are on Sidestrand beach...

... looking East towards Trimingham with nary a soul (nor groyne) in sight.

The chalk beds have been exposed - this is what happens sans groynes!

Thursday, March 09, 2017

"Pamela Anderson will not be invited."*

  Good news everybody! Ms Scarlet in the Pantry with the Can-Opener, the unofficial and unauthorised biography of our very own Ms Scarlet is published today - Just in time for her birthday!

  And, being the attentive and sharing witch that I am, I have at my disposal an exclusive excerpt from chapter ten "A Day In The Life". You won't find this using amuze.bouke.cusp's 'Look Inside' feature!

  As always, just click the pics to embigulate to, if not prodigious, then at least quite large (and readable) proportions.


The most hideous painting in the world - Courtesy of original Coven founder member, Dora
For those not in the know, may I present: Lakeland

Sunday, March 05, 2017

The Early Bird Catches the Sun...

 ...because who wants to catch worms? Besides, it's raining now...

  The Parents' are away for the weekend, so I've been house-sitting their new abode. It's only a two minute walk from the beach, so I popped out reasonably early this morning with Camera. This is a selection of what I came back with:

If I'd got up a little earlier, I would have seen the sun rise over the North Sea
(in the distance are Sidestrand and Trimingham)

North. Ish. Probably North North East?

Around the cliff there on the left is Cromer.
Although there's still a lot of Overstrand before one gets to Cromer

Thursday, March 02, 2017

Of Prophet's Tears and Verteron Nodes...

  OK. Here is my entry for the February Art Challenge as mentioned in the previous post.

"Hey, you lot! Come and look at this" yelled the first verteron node.
"Oooh! The Prophets have been crying golden tears again" said the second.
"I can see my face in it..."


  As you can tell - and as Witchface kindly pointed out - I didn't even try to come up with anything new. Instead, I combined the sculpturalesque golden "Tear of the Prophets" with my paper lantern-filled green glass demijohn (from the most recent Items of Interest post) to create an unfilmed scene from the Star Trek: Deep Space Nine pilot episode "Emissary".
  The lanterns stood in for the verteron nodes present in the Celestial Temple/wormhole, and in my photo, they're peering at the Tear (or orb, as they are also known) containing Jadzia Dax as it passes by on the way to Deep Space 9.

  I did try stuffing the orb in the demijohn with the lights, but it just looked all wobbly like a soap opera flashback/dream sequence...  

Sunday, February 26, 2017

The Celestial Temple cries golden tears

  As I don't have anything else prepared - well, certainly nothing that's actually finished - you're going to have to put up with some Star Trek stuff.

  And I'm not sorry.

  But don't worry, it's just a couple of VERY quick sketches and a physical cut-n-paste job for the other social media site that I frequent. Remember? I told you about it here. And here.
Anyway, February's Art Challenge is "Pilot", and here is the challenge:  

With the pilot episode of Star Trek Discovery coming (eventually) I thought it might be cool to look back at the first episodes of the Star Trek shows and pick something from your favourite that clearly represents that episode.

Maybe you like the "man-skirts" of Encounter at Farpoint or Number One from The Cage, Jake fishing in the holodeck from The Emissary or Harry being abducted and experimented on in Caretaker... actually that might have been any episode :whistle:

  Ideally, neither of these will be my final entry, but as there're only two more days left in this month, the likelyhood is that I won't get anything else done*.
  Just in case my creations are so appalling that those of you who may be fans of Deep Space Nine can't recognise them, I went with DS9's "Emissary" and the scene where Jadzia Dax as a Tear of the Prophets is ejected from the Celestial Temple/wormhole:

* I think we all know The Host isn't even going to try.

Thursday, February 23, 2017

Blue and Green...

 Well. What a selection of guesses as to the previous post's Item of Interest! My fancy hasn't been tickled like that in quite some time, let me tell you.
 One of you managed to correctly identify the item in question, but before I reveal who it was, I'd like to share my favourite fancy ticklers. So, in no particular order, the preposterous runners up are:

 Mr Peenee with "I keep thinking it has something to do with the Statue of Liberty, probably because of the color, but it seems unlikely the S of L has taken up refuge in the Castelette. Although in a world where Donald Trump runs the American government, sort of, I guess "unlikely" is a shaky concept."
 Shaky, indeed, Peenee. Especially as I discovered Lady Liberty trying to get in the catflap the other day when I got home from work. Needless to say, she was a little on the large side to squeeze through, so I shooed her out to the pond where she stands in place of one of the solar-powered garden lights (that don't work because of the lack of sunlight Britain enjoys). Turns out she just wanted a little holiday from all the "goings on" across the Pond...
 She won't keep still, though, and all her tramping around has turned the garden into a mud bath! On the plus side, she does stand in for Cromer lighthouse when the bulb needs changing.

 Jon, with: "You've managed to get a courgette? During this crisis?"
 Yuck! No! Although I did buy an iceberg lettuce for the outrageous price of £1.40 the other day!

 Hound, with: "A corner of a cover you have made for one of the alien plants in the greenhouse?"
 I'm disappointed in you, Hound, as it was you (or your comment here) that inspired this thing! But you have reminded me that I need to feed those voracious plants...

::holds nose and heaves bucket of fermenting mince out of the airing cupboard::

 So. Without further ado - or maybe a little ado as this teaser photo attests:

Sunday, February 19, 2017

Items of Interest: ...Should Never Be Seen

 Yes, it's back. After a little over a year since the last one, Items of Interest returns!

 What - you may be asking - has prompted this comeback? Well, just something I overheard from one of you. Oh, and that this is quick and easy as I have had (and will have) very little time to myselves what with getting The Parents' moved into their new abode, and dealing with The Royal Visit, aka the arrival for the weekend of Indescribable, The Little Witch, and Babyzooky.

 So. On with the show: For those of you who are new to this, or have forgotten what to do since the last Items of Interest post (and the one before that brought us the infamous "nylon netting shower pom pom on a string thingamie"), the rules are as follows:
 Just guess what these particular photos are of and, if you're very lucky, win a prize (yet to be determined)*. And I don't mean the photo up there as that's the logo image (from The Towering Disco Inferno). No. The photo's below (after the jump).

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Moving for the sake of a toilet roll holder

 I haven't been around as much as I'd've liked this past week or two, but I do have a reason: The Parents are on the verge of moving house - the big day being this Monday. 
 Obviously, this means that their selfless, abled-bodied, only son - i.e. me - has been kept busy with various heavy lifting, packing, cleaning, and storage tasks. In fact, I've just returned from The Parents' having loaded Car full of boxes of things that The Mother doesn't want the removal men to lose or break. 
 As I drifted in and out of The Mother's stream of wittering, I caught this little nugget of information: "This will be the first house I've lived in with a [built in] toilet roll holder!" 
I couldn't bear to ask if that was the reason for moving...


 In other news, a couple of days ago, my viewing of Harry Hill's You've Been Framed was rudely interrupted by the phone ringing. After much exasperated sighing, I heaved myself off the sofa and answered the phone to a really-quite-convincing and very youthful Lancashire-accented: "Have you seen my friend? Kimberley?"

Sunday, February 05, 2017

Two sides to every story...

 ... and two sides to my book case.

 I have vague recollections of threatening to show you my bookcase towards the end of last year. I don't know whose blog this threat was left at, but I don't think it was mine?
 Anyway, as a warm-up to another year of reading-
  And because we've got shit-all else to blog about!
 Well. Yes. Um... Here is our bookcase. The upstairs one, not the downstairs one which is a bit higgledy-piggledy, and stuffed with gardening and recipe books.
  Not to mention Inexcuseable's cat books, Elvis collection, and Twilight novels, and her husband's fishing and DIY books.

Embigulatory probing can be effected by clicking...

... and I only had to do a modicum of "weeding"

 As I've shown you mine, will you show us yours?

 Snippets of Mago's have already been released, and Hound's bathroom bookshelf has been seen out and about in public, but there's always room for more!

 UPDATE 12.02.2017 : LẌ's industrial-strength shelves are on display here, and MrPeenee is on a promise...

 UPDATE 23.02.2017 : In fact, just pop to The Very Mistress's for a handy list of all who have taken part (so far)... 

Wednesday, February 01, 2017

Not A Real Book On Not A Real Chair

 Mwah hah hah hah haaa! 

 Just when you thought the Book On A Chair meme couldn't be flogged anymore, may I present my latest diabolical twist on Ms Scarlet's original masterpiece:

A Kindle eBook on a chair made of real books

 If you have poor eyesight, or couldn't be bothered to click the pic to embigulate it, the books that make up the chair (plus the eBook) are those that I have read so far this year:

1. The Face of the Unknown (Star Trek: The Original Series), by Christopher L. Bennett (2016)

2. Grinny, by Nicholas Fisk (1973 [this edition 1987])

3. The City and the Stars, by Arthur C. Clarke (1956 [this edition 1978])

4. Not the Royal Wedding, written & edited by Sean Hardie and John Lloyd (1981)

5. The Carpet People, by Terry Pratchett, aged 17 (1971) and 43 (1992)

 That's it for now. We'll be back soon with cake (not CAKE!), Redshirts, and - possibly - Mrs Snatchpenny and her Hindu robot.


Thursday, January 26, 2017

RNLB Lester

 So. Here it is. The third and final set of photos from Sunday's daydrift along the coast from Cromer to West Runton. The subject is the RNLI Cromer Lifeboat RNLB Lester (RNLI 16-07).

This was taken from East Runton. I turned around to look back at Cromer and saw a boat near the pier

I didn't realise until later that it was the Cromer Lifeboat Lester

After I'd taken all those photos of the stripey cliffs at West Runton, I turned back for home and noticed the Lester offshore

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Contorted Drifts, Chalk Rafts, and Pro-Glacial Zones*

* No, I don't know what we're talking about either. We're a witch, not a geologist!
We appropriated those sciencey terms here.

 As promised threatened in the last post, may I present the batch of photographs from Sunday 22nd cataloguing some of the geological features of the Cromer-East Runton cliffs. I'm not going to say much about them as I know next to bog-all about such things, I just think they're unusual. And some of them are quite pretty. 

No, it wasn't cold enough for blocks of ice to wash up - those are chalk boulders

This is the stretch of cliff that I found most fascinating. Get ready for the close-ups!

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Blue Skies and Beaches

 The sun is out. The sun is out!

 Ten o'clock this morning I left Castlette DeVice is a blaze of winter sunshine. Unlike most daydrifts I undertake, I had already decided where I was going to walk before I left the house castlette: along the beach to West Runton (last walked here - for the first time).
 Now, you might find some of these photos somewhat repetitive in nature, but my incredible indecisiveness kicked in with a vengeance making choosing between them more difficult than a life or death decision.

Leaving Cromer Pier behind me

Landscapes in the black mirror are closer than they appear...

A bijou beach residence for when you want to get away from it all!

Friday, January 20, 2017


Dear "friend" of

Fed up with your government/communist dictator/family/weather/life?

Sick to death of being associated with the useless population of your crummy country?

Being hounded by the masses for voting "incorrectly" in the latest farcical presidential election/EU referendum/parish council by-election/X Factor semi-final/W.I. Chutneys and Pickles Campaign?


Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Slow you down

Photographs from a trio of daydrifts.


Cromer beach. More than a bit blustery and nippy

The beginnings of a rainbow