I found myself on hands and knees on the bathroom floor the other night.
And you can stop those thoughts right there!
Honestly, feed you a line and you gobble it down like you haven't eaten in a week.
Lawks! etc. etc...
Anyway, there I was, painstakingly locating and retrieving all the bits of finger and toenail that I'd accidently spread all over the floor with a flick of the towel*, when the light was suddenly obscured.
"What the...?" I exclaimed, looking up. "Oh."
"Hello" the light obscurer said. "Sorry to just turn up like this."
I squinted as I looked into the eyes of my visitor, then recognition kicked in. "Hmmm... You could've waited a few minutes - I'm not dressed."
"Yes. I can see" my visitor admitted, wincing slightly.
"Hey! I don't know what that look was for?"
"What do you mean? What 'look'?"
"That wincing look." I was getting mildly annoyed now. "You've been in me before - you should be familiar with this."
"Yes. Well. That was a long time ago."
"Speaking of which, when are you coming from?"
"Ah. That would explain the ridiculous get-up."
My visitor just looked down his nose at me before saying "I expect you want to know what I'm doing here?"
Funnily enough, I didn't. And I told him so. "No."
"Not even a little curious?" he asked.
"Look. I'm hot, tired and naked" I replied. "I'm more curious about my bed."
"Well, you haven't got the luxury of sleep. At least not yet."
* This might be TMI, but I find it easier to clip finger & toenails during or after a bath as the hot water makes them softer and easier to cut. I usually collect as I clip and leave them in a little pile on the edge of the bath rather than leave them rolling around at the bottom of the bath - there's nothing worse than feeling a sharp prick in one's bum when wallowing around in the bath...