Saturday, April 18, 2015

Ripples in the sand


 As there's precious little else to report at the moment, I thought I'd just show you some photos from my last spell ingredient hunt on Cromer beach.

Looking west to Cromer - Cromer church tower on the left, and the pier reaching out to sea

 I took the following photos while flying low over the beach on Broom. I rather like the alienness of the patterns in the wet sand.









 Until next time...
 

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Jelly Babies of Doom... are Dooomed!



 In this, the final part of the Jelly Babies saga, the Jelly Babies of Doom meet their doom!*

The terrifying Dysonzoid is more than a match for the Jelly Babies of Doom

The fleeing Jelly Babies are quickly picked off

Dysonzoid's turbo head smushes the Jelly Babies to smithereens!


 
* Mainly because I kept eating them between photo-shoots. Oops!

 

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Jelly Babies vs Zoids, Part 2


Continued from... Jelly Babies vs Zoids, Part 1

 In a desperate attempt to boost ratings, some new, sexier characters zoids have been introduced!

Having run the Brontozoid off the edge of a desk cliff after the last episode, the Jelly Babies of Doom acquire new targets

A Kroc makes short work of a Yellow Jelly Baby but attracts the attentions of the fallen Baby's brethren

The Scorpozoid and a Mantazoid are of no help to the Kroc

The Jelly Babies prevent the Kroc from opening its deadly jaws

The Zoids are quickly overpowered by the remaining Jelly Babies of Doom

Continued in... Jelly Babies of Doom... are Dooomed!


Thursday, April 09, 2015

Jelly Babies vs Zoids, Part 1


Continued from... Jelly Babies on the move


 An increase in the budget means that we've been able to build a new set and props!

The Jelly Babies of Doom come across a lone Stegazoid and quickly devour it

A Brontozoid and Mantazoid come to the stricken Stegazoid's aid, but too late!

Brontozoid blasts a couple of Jelly Babies apart, but Mantazoid is quickly overpowered

Realising that resistance is futile, the Brontozoid turns to flee, vowing to bring help

Some of the Jelly Babies of Doom give chase...

 Continued in... Jelly Babies vs Zoids, Part 2

 

Wednesday, April 08, 2015

Jelly Babies on the move


 Nearly five years ago, we left Evil Tim and his Evil Duplicates on the Granite Planet being attacked and devoured by the Jelly Babies of Doom. Don't you think it's about time we had a look to see what they're up to now?

 
Hungry and tired, the Jelly Babies of Doom march across the Granite Planet


Plotting amongst themselves, the Jelly Babies conspire against their kin

The ravenous Jelly Babies fall upon their weaker comrades, devouring them

Carnage ensues (rated at least 18 [UK] or R [US])

Sated, and their number thinned, the Jelly Babies of Doom pass Kettle Point and head towards the White Plains

Tune in next time for another thrilling episode!


Saturday, April 04, 2015

The Barbara Cartland Diaries


 Well, here we are with April's update of books read so far this year. You'll probably be pleased to see there's only one Star Trek entry, and that I've provided some excerpts from the re-reading of Not the Royal Wedding. Enjoy!


 17. Horrorstör, by Grady Hendrix
 
 This book was a birthday present from my ex-stalkee and Coven member, Tim.
 It's a nice (perhaps 'nice' is the wrong word?) little horror story based in a Swedish-style furniture store, called Orsk - nothing too far-out or ground breaking - but what I really like about it (and I presume is its selling point) is that it looks like a catalogue for an IKEA-type store. Inside, the theme continues with fold-out cover flaps with maps of the store, order forms, coupons, advertisements, and each chapter begins with a catalogue listing of an item of furniture (and later, as the horror become apparent) or torture device. Good use is made of how stores like this are laid out in such a way to get customers to buy more than they intended, and how it's easy to lose one's bearings and get lost.



  18. Rise of the Federation: Uncertain Logic (Star Trek: Enterprise), by Christopher L. Bennett

 I know. A new Star Trek novel even though I said previously that I wouldn't be purchasing one until at least July when David R. George III's latest Deep Space Nine tale - Sacraments of Fire - is released.
 I couldn't help myself. Despite not really giving two figs about the Enterprise era (mid-22nd century), Christopher L. Bennett's amazing writing got me hooked again. Damn him!



 19. Not The Royal Wedding, edited by Sean Hardie & John Lloyd

 Yes, another year means another read of this absolutely hilarious "Not An Official Souvenir" of Charles & Di's Royal Wedding.
 This time, I thought I'd share some of it with you. You've already been treated to the advertisement for exquisite recreations of some of Barbara Cartland's famous hats in my previous post, so here are the rest of her bits, if you'll pardon my French:


Click to embiggen
See how Raine Spencer (Di's stepmum)
is really related to Dame Barbara
A page from the Spencer Family Album
Preparations for Dame Barbara's attendance to the Royal Wedding

Tragically, Yves was crushed to death by
his very creation when it fell on top of him
Dame Barbara had her own tier of the wedding cake



 20. Weirdos From Another Planet, by Bill Watterson

 This volume of Calvin & Hobbes strips contains such gems as the origin of Stupendous Man and the feature debuts of both Rosalyn (aka the fiendish Baby Sitter Girl) and Calvin's killer bicycle. Bill Watterson had originally intended for Rosalyn to be a one off character, but he liked her relationship with Calvin so much that he brought her back again and again, thankfully. She's about the only person Calvin's afraid of!
 There're some hilarious strips about Calvin being taken on a camping holiday by his parents - I especially like his mom's reaction to the idea of getting up at the crack of dawn to go fishing. It's clear she'd rather be in a nice hotel with room service, totally undermining her husband's enthusiasm for the 'character building' trip!


Friday, April 03, 2015

Not the Hats of Barbara Cartland


 Inspired by Mistress Maddie's most recent post, I thought I'd give a little teaser of my upcoming book post.

Click to inflate to Earl's Court proportions


 My favourite of Dame Barbara's hats has to be Cows Bowel: "Horrid intestinal excrescence aborted by Christian Barnard, and climaxed with lashings of Dream Topping. (Buyer to collect)*"

 Runners up include Pilchard: "Informal bonnet de boudoir et cache-pyjamas in reversible vinyl", and Vol-au-Vent Quatro Stagine: "In choux pastry with glacé shrimps by Mr West of Fraserborough". Vol-au-Vent reminds me of Audrey's understated little number over at Mistress Maddie's...


* "Incidentally, will Mr R. Norris of Liverpool who ordered last year's model 'Yaks Colostomy' please contact us urgently."

Thursday, April 02, 2015

Harried by Hair-Raising Hunks


This is shaping up to be another one of those weeks...

 Sunday, late afternoon - I was on my way home astride Broom when I remembered that I needed some frogspawn for a spell I'm working on. Surprising myself somewhat, I made a rather elegant landing in a little copse on the edge of the large pond between the road and the old railway line. Luckily, I had an empty Tupperware container in my bag (I'd just dropped a cake off at a friend's) that I could collect the spawn in. Imagine my surprise at finding a merman basking in the last rays of afternoon sun!
 

 Turned out that he was more surprised than I was; as he flipped off the fallen tree trunk he was reclined on and plopped into the depths of the pond. Needless to say, the splashback drenched me in cold water and, ironically, the frogspawn I'd stopped to gather.
 

 Tuesday, 18:12 (no cannons going off, thankfully) - Driving past Northrepps Aerodrome on my way home from work, I was unwrapping a Fox's Glacier Fruit (and therefore not taking much notice of the road), when Car suddenly slammed on the brakes and swerved! The Glacier Fruit went flying into the windscreen as I looked up in shock. We'd narrowly avoided a very low flying warlock coming in to land.
 I watched, shaking my head, as the obviously enebriated young man banked to the right, pulled up his hoe to narrowly clear the hedge, before tumbling into the field beyond. I was half out of Car to see if he was ok, wrinkling my nose at the lingering absinthe fumes left in the young warlock's wake, when I heard laughter and shouts of "Dude!" and "Bro!" from his boorish coven. Recognising one of the approaching 'bros' as my eye-candy, I treated myself to a lingering leer stare at his impressive abs and pecs - on show between the open zipper of his grey hoodie - before getting back in Car and driving off.
 Bloody hooligans!  


  And Today, just now - I'd opened the wardrobe to hang some clean clothes only to discover an errant Norse god trying on a pair of my jeans!






 I may be some time...

  

Saturday, March 28, 2015

Devour her heart


 Ug. There's so much racket that I can barely hear myself think, nevermind come up with something worth posting.

 Claudine!  Claudine!



Monday, March 23, 2015

Just out of grasp


Warlock's new clothes by Emperor Chic
Body by Mac Robinson
 Oof! Sorry I'm late. I've been trying to excuse myselves from ageing another year, to no avail, sadly. Someone said that one is only as old as the man one feels, but Broom couldn't catch up to the hoe-riding studly young warlock from the next village, so I'm stuck with feeling my actual age.

 Bah!

Babyzilla says: Hands off! This lot is mine!
 Still, it's not been so bad. At least there was an excuse to eat cake! And plenty of it - along with a sumptuous afternoon tea at Lily's Tearoom. The Ladies of Lily's outdid themselves once again; providing delightful delectables for the whole family, enough even to satiate Babyzilla!

 Plus, there were no nymphs in sight. That Banish really works wonders!