Wednesday 3 November 2021

GPE #1 - Terrifying Triffidery Results & The League of Extraordinary Gardeners

 Yes, it's that time at last!

Welcome to the

I N F O M A N I A C

 Garden Photos Event 2021!

I see many of you managed to get through the Terrifying Triffidery exhibit relatively unscathed.
No matter, there's always next year...

 Right, then.  We'd better start the show.  First up, a little background for any newcomers or the easily befuddled:  The Garden Photos Event first appeared on our screens ten years ago, brought into existence by The Very Mistress (then known as MJ), the Infomaniac herself!  It was an occasion for Infomaniac Bitches to show off their green fingers and thumbs by displaying their gardens/windowboxes/houseplants/salad drawer for all and sundry to gaze at in wonder/mine for ideas/critique with scathing derision - no, not that last one, forget that.  For you see, the GPE was a safe space to mingle and enjoy the greenery, and NOT a competition (as The Very Mistress had to stress more than once).

 It was so popular that it became an annual event and, in 2020, The Very Mistress relinquished the reins to me (a great honour indeed) which is why the GPE is now being hosted here at Inexplicable Device.  A little more of its history can be found here, along with links to all the featured gardens up until 2020.  Links to 2020's gardens can be found here (or just click my Garden Photos Event label/tag-thingy).

 So, onto the gardens.  Let me just throw open the French doors so we can all go outsi-

 Ah.  It appears that my League of Extraordinary Gardeners haven't quite finished all their mowing and hoeing.  Apologies.  Um...  Oh, what to do now?  Ah!  I know: let's take a look at those Terrifying Triffidery specimens and find out who sent in what.

- - -

Oh, if anyone got a bit hot under the collar when they witnessed all that strenuous manual labour, and should require a cooling hose-down, just let me know as I think I saw the gardeners' assistant with his hose out around here somewhere...

- - -

 Anyway, on with the Terrifying Triffidery results:

 The pterodactyl, sea anemone, Abyss alien, and sex toy were supplied by our favourite down-under gardener (not a euphemism.  Unless it is?), Dinahmow!

Strelitzia nicolai, Mimosa pudica, Vanda "Pat's Delight", and a red Anthurium
 

 The salad (which I wouldn't advise eating, by the way) and The Color Out of Space were provided by a man who is no stranger to working his many green fingers and thumbs up his back passage, Jon!

The extremely poisonous Ricinus communis, and a Cymbidium orchid flower (somewhat Photoshopped...)

 The moist flaps & folds, and the veiny, pulsating insides were donated by the darling Mistress Maddie  (I can't imagine why she didn't want them?)

An autumn cabbage
 

 The suggestive tree, screws, venus fly trap, and kidney stones/death-by-shitting plant all came from marvellous Melanie.

Red Cedar, a textured branch, Venus fly-trap, and Wood sorrel (Oxalis)
 

 The Audrey IIs all sprung up from the gardens here at Hexenhäusli Device.

Cobaea scandens, aka cup-and-saucer vine
 

 And, finally, that rather horrific hedgehog/deer amalgam (which also lent itself to the title image) made its way here from the macabre Ms Scarlet!

A sweet chestnut, of course!

☙❧

  As The Very Mistress's garden wasn't in tip-top shape this year, she regretfully declined to send in any photos.  So, to make up for her absence and all the horror above, here are a couple of snaps of the Infomaniac Garden from years past:

2012

2014

 So, that's it from the first Garden Photos Event post.  The Event continues in a couple of days time with the gardens of Ms Nations (AKA Steve.  Because 'Steve' is almost as a nice a name as 'Paul' was.), so don't wander off too far.

27 comments:

  1. The "cabbage" is fearsomely intestinal... I make no further comment on that. Jx

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    Replies
    1. Quite. I certainly wouldn't want it with my mash.

      Delete
  2. I have Coleus envy. That MJ specimen is STUNNING!
    I'm hoping to get a post up today with a few more images...
    Thank you for hosting this. (I imagine a thready little voice echoing softly in the ether...wondering if he's won yet...)

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    Replies
    1. MJ/TVM's Coleus really is something. It looks like someone's ornate sewing project rather than a plant.

      Ah, LẌ will always win. Even though the Garden Photos Event is NOT a competition!

      P.S. I see a new post from you on my sideboard - I'll be there shortly.

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    2. My garden was so unappealing this year that even the rabbits stayed away. Thankfully, the rest of you are in top form.

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    3. I'm not particularly thrilled with my garden either, Very Mistress. It was such a disappointing Spring & Summer weather wise that a lot of the plants just didn't really get going. However, I do have some photos of the new pond...

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  3. They are all gorgeous. But I must say that I find Mistress' Maddie's cabbage captivating. And I am surprised by MsScarlet's chestnut. Finally I am eagerly awaiting Ms Nation's planter ...

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    Replies
    1. I think Ms Scarlet's chestnut surprised everyone?!

      You're in for a treat with Ms Nation's garden - the post will be published tomorrow at midday.

      Delete
  4. Oh. How fun. I didn't get my photos together and quite frankly... I don't think what I had to show would have come close to all this beauty. So, I'll leave it to the experts. Bravo, all! Stunning stuff.

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    1. Oh, I'm sorry you're not taking part, Upton. There's still time if you change your mind (and if it helps, one of the GPE posts - the 3rd - doesn't even feature any plants!).

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  5. How fun and what excellent submissions. It's is so neat to see what the plants turn out to be. And I must say Mistress Maddie's and Scarlet's gave me the willies, even after the reveal. I think the water beads threw me off. I have always though those cabbages were alien looking, as well so some of Jon's. How ever did I miss the first post?

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    1. I quite agree, Ms Goldberg-DeWoofs! For things that we would normally eat, Ms Scarlet's and Mistress Maddie's specimens look for all the world like they would, if not eat us, then certainly mess us up and leave us in a ditch, gibbering incoherently somewhere.

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  6. YAY!!!! I thought for sure the orchid or your Audrey's were going to be dear Jon's. And Scarlet's second picture reminded me of baby squirrels cramming into a nest.

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    1. Well, you were close with the Audreys, Maddie, as Jon gave me the seeds that they grew from!

      Yes, Ms Scarlet's real coloured chestnut looks orders of magnitude cuter than the Triffid one.

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  7. I think all my guesses were wrong! Though pleased to know that people are surprised by my chestnut.
    I think the triffid aspect of the event is going to be even more spooky next year, just a hunch.
    Sx

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    Replies
    1. Ah, but you did think the colour close-ups could be either Maddie's or Dinah's - and they were!

      I suspect your chestnut will be giving people ideas (if not nightmares) for next year, Ms Scarlet. So, yes, hopefully it will be more spooky next year.

      Delete
  8. I'm quite taken with MJ's pink and puce coitus, though it looks a bit rough around the edges and susceptible to grey rot. I once saw a bride in Spain carrying a bouquet of red anthurium and what looked like banana leaves and she never had the courtesy to blush.

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    Replies
    1. The hussy!

      Of course, I'm talking about the Spanish bride, not The Very Mistress. Really.

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    2. I've forgotten what type of coleus that was but it was a beauty.

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  9. Replies
    1. They're fabulous, aren't they Norma! And, you know, it's not too late if you want to join in - this thing will be going on all month!

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    2. Thank you darling, but voyeur is my middle name.

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    3. I'll get my gardening Hoes to do another lap with their tools out for you, then.

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  10. IDV, I'm really enjoying all of these plant pictures! Thank you so much! You're a wonderful host and I couldn't possibly have guessed correctly what came from where! You even changed your banner pic for the garden event!

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    1. Oh, you're very welcome, Melanie! Curating everyone's photos is little effort compared to that put into all the gardens, so thank you - and everyone else!

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  11. Here I am me dear, rather late for the party and with lots of catching up to do. I have started at the very beginning because that is a very good place yo start.
    I am so pleased that Triffidery has returned again this year and there are some fine examples of it to boot.
    Your Audrey is adorable but I must ask if you applied it's lipstick yourself? either way she is stunning as are all the entries I was particularly taken with the Blue of Strelitzia nicolai.
    Looks like catching up will be jolly good fun.
    ttfn

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    1. I am thrilled with the variety of triffidery that have been let loose this year. Although, corralling them into some sort of order for safe observation was quite demanding. None more so than Audrey - and, yes, I did have to apply the lipstick. She wouldn't vogue for the camera until she was "ready for my close-up, Mr DeVice"!

      I'm sure you'll enjoy all the gardens, Madam A - Just like we enjoy yours!

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