A Case of
M I S T A K E N I D E N T I T Y
at the Garden Photos Event
"Good day Mr. Peenee,
I am a new fan of your blog as I enjoy uncut dick* and they are hard to find here in the U.S.
Sending you some humble pictures of my home and two rose bushes that came from my Grandfather’s garden. They have graced my yard (family home) for over 60 years.
Thank you for all the wonderful posts!"
-- A fan of Peenee's from Portland, Maine
I have withheld the senders name to respect at least some of their privacy as they didn't respond to my query about whether they were really meant for the GPE, or just for Peenee. But, equally, as there was no response, I feel perfectly justified in sharing these garden photos:
Thank you Mysterious Stranger! Your rhodedendrons and roses are beautiful.
☙❧
* For those who may not have visited Peenee's blog, a 'dick' is a purple flowering growth with a woody stem, commonly found cut and displayed singularly or with another specimen (and sometimes, more). It seems that in the US at least, the dick is not often found in its natural state, growing wild as nature intended.
Our final stop on the Infomaniac Garden Photos Event tour is my own gar-
Wait a moment. I'm getting an update... We have a last minute entry: It's Savvy!
What a surprise...
I find that quite amusing - that fan of Mr Peenee's regular collection of [cut and] uncut dicks should send you pictures of his own uncut rosebud(s)!
ReplyDeleteThey're quite the spectacle! [Both his, and the specimens Peenee usually posts.] Jx
Spectacles are encouraged. Afterall, we wouldn't want any of the larger growths to have anyone's eye out!
DeleteI love the flowering ladder.
ReplyDeleteOh, Very Mistress, I didn't notice the ladder until you pointed it out!
DeleteAnd I almost had one of my own this year, too. I wanted an old wooden ladder to fix to the garage wall in order to grow climbers up, but couldn't find a free or inexpensive one. (There were plenty of ridiculously expensive "vintage" or "rustic" wooden ladders though. People must be daft to spend the money that they were being sold for!)
These are lovely. I don't have any roses of my own, but I hear they prefer the blood and bone of one's enemies for proper growth and nutrition. We best not make an enemy of this mysterious stranger!
ReplyDeleteAh, you know to stay on the good side of anyone sporting lush and vigorous roses.
DeleteWell paint me confused. Why did I expect to see a glory hole? Filled.
ReplyDeleteSavy made it?!?!?! We for sure are going to have a blizzard now.
Could it be your mind, Maddie? You can get up off your knees now.
DeletePINK!!!!!!! Glorious! Pleased this entry made the cut.
ReplyDeleteSx
That certainly is a glorious pink bush. Although it doesn't have the pulsating action of your own Big Pink Bush™!
Delete"made the cut" made me smirk ;)
I live in the US and have no problem finding uncut peen. I rather love that last photo. Very idyllic. I think this has been my favorite feature these past months. Bravo. Kizzes.
ReplyDeletePerhaps you could pass on your tips to Mr Peenee's fan, David from Portland, Upton?
DeleteSeymour Dick and his lovely blooms.
ReplyDeleteWell, as Jon pointed out upthread, Seymour Dick is also showing off his rosebuds!
DeleteHi folks, What a surprise to see my home and roses in a post! Mr. Infomaniac I'm sorry I got you confused with Mr. Peenee I read your posts as they come out and enjoy you both(and the uncut dick). Sadly the last bloom of Summer has faded and Winter is knocking at the door. And yes to the person who commented about blood and bones to make roses thrive, I just let my husband trim them the man is like an army surgeon, cut first ask questions later!Thank you all Sincerely David from Portland Maine
ReplyDeleteWelcome, David from Portland! I'm glad you joined our little garden get-together as your roses are gorgeous!
DeleteNo need to apologise about the mixup with Mr Peenee - I only wish I could muster up as much dick as he. However, The Very Mistress - the Infomaniac herself (who started this whole Garden Photos Event malarkey ten years ago) - may have something to say about me becoming Mr. Infomaniac. Although, she was just imagining me naked...
I understand your confusion, david-from-Portlandia; Inexplicable and I are both lanky, doe eyed beauties. I think your garden is one of the very finest of this year's event. Since I have no garden to enter, I think I should be in for a share if David-from-Portland wins. Did we win yet?
Delete* bats eye-lashes then trips over own legs *
DeleteDrat! Now I can't say "May I remind you that the Garden Photos Event is NOT a contest!" and have anyone take me seriously.
So beautiful!
ReplyDeleteI'd love to have cascading roses on the side of the house, too!
XOXO
They're gorgeous, aren't they?! And with that ladder, I bet they'll be over the roof in no time.
DeleteIf I see much more bush, I'll be getting wood. And we know what happens then!
ReplyDeleteOh, dear. I'd better make sure everyone gets their waders or wellies on, and let them know not to make eye-contact while you "enjoy" their lower legs...
DeleteThat climbing rose bush is a stunner! I alas have no luck with roses either. Maybe I need to hire a gardener?
ReplyDeleteYou need more enemies, Ms Goldberg-DeWoofs. Then, when you have vanquished them, you can feed their blood and bone to your roses as David from Portland does so they can produce such stunning displays!
Delete