The Year of Looking Glam Even Without Nail Varnish

 As you may have noticed, we haven't been around much this year.  Certainly not as much as I'd've liked, and not even as much as in last year's Lazy Baggagery!  So that means that our grasp on the year's happenings and your reportings thereof is weak at best.  Sorry.

 However, there was certainly enough memorable stuff (and things I'd thought to make a note of when they happened) to create this end-of-year extravaganza!

 Extravaganza?  That's pushing it, don't you think?

 Nah.  A sprinkle of glitter (thanks to Jon) will cover the cracks and gaping holes in this rather haphazard (as always) round up and turn it into the Event of the season!

 If you say so...  Shall we get on with it, then?

 Yes. Oh, hang on!  I've got to add a bit at the end about the return of the "Did I Win Yet?" Award/Quiz/Competition/Event/Festival thingy!

 Well, you'd better hurry because I'm launching this thing now.  Be ready with your Champagne flutes all you glamorous Blogorati!

 

 Oops!  Wrong signage.  Try this one:

 Strap in.  Here we go!

January

Quote : "My smut well has almost dried up." ~ What a way to start the year: The Very Mistress answering a question nobody asked.

Event : The 6th January was National Cuddle Up Day, apparently.  Although I'd want to cuddle up to those freckles EVERY day!  Adorable. 

 

 Thank you for bringing this auspicious occasion to our attention, Mr Tonking.

 

 

Art : Nouveau, of course.  I love the fantastical, soft intricacy of Art Nouveau, and don't indulge myself in it as often as I should.  Fortunately, Maddie popped up with a themed Mood Board this month which hit the spot.

 

Hot Totty : When it's cold outside, guests at the House of Borghese are offered furs with something hot inside. 

 Not this one though - he's mine!  Get your own!

February

Blogorati : Dear departed LẌ visited The Very Mistress in Blogging from Beyond the Grave. 

 

 I'm not sure if LẌ left any bats up her nightdress, but I'd like to think he did.

 

Art : I got to play with my lifesize Ensign Samanthan Rutherford action figures!!!

 

(Fortunately, I have a very big mouth so I didn't need to dislocate my jaw...)
 

 

March

Blogorati : The Very Mistress turned seventeen!  And has barely been seen since.

Event : Melanie's Nature-led Life Photo Submissions series brought forth this stunning photo of a rocket launch from Cape Canaveral by Lisa Troute.

Quote : "... birthdays have been abolished and Ms Scarlet Blue, far from becoming a mouse, gains various super-powers such as x-ray vision and telepathy." ~  Oh, dear.  Nick unleashes a monster! 

 

Art : For my birthday, I got a tattoo (I'm not usually that shade of blue, but it was decidedly nippy in the sonic showers that day...)

Ms Nations : "Forensic Jelly Tornado Eleven !" and "Vast Pork Crater 114 Year!" ~ I wasn't sure whether to categorise these awesome blog post titles under 'Blogorati', 'Quote', or 'Art', so in the end I just went with 'Ms Nations', for it is she from whence these stunning collections of words originated.  Thank you, Ms Nations.

April

Quote :  "WOW, YOU LOOK GLAM!! EVEN WITHOUT NAIL VARNISH YOU’D LOOK LIKE A MOVIE STAR!!" ~ Ms Scarlet (for the second time, with much encouragement) to Dinah.  And again by Mago. 

 

 Could this be the new "Make It Wear Big Pants" quote?

Blogorati : Ms Scarlet was mistaken for Lorraine Chase (but not Joan Collins), Patricia Hodge, one of the Bananas, a Nolan, and/or Princess Di.  In that order.

What do you think?

 

Labels : 'Shopping and Fucking' chez Delores Delargo Towers.  This aptly named label graced a post full of dastardly dick, compact pussy, perfect peters and a Turbo Terrific!

GIF : The Very Mistress is sighted at Jon's and startles Maddie, Ms Scarlet, and me.

Quote : "Idiocy is the essence of the male mind" ~ Suzie Derkins, at Mago's.

Note to self: Read more Calvin & Hobbes in 2024

May

Quote : "Could we have a bit of crumpet now?" ~  Apparently, Leonard Rossiter and Jeremy Clyde weren't good enough for Dinah. 

 Fortunately, Jon went all the way to Sitges to score us some...

Sitges Totty : Woof!

 There were also some smashing blouses sported in Sitges.  And some that, upon closer inspection, were hideous!

GIF : Tell me Legs & Co.'s feather boa festooned thrusting isn't perfectly in time with "We Still Believe" by the Blessed Madonna up next?

 

Music :

June

Art : Ms Nations' amazing art as teased in the post about trees causing her to barf while wearing her maidenform bra!

 

Homes & Gardens : Every stately home and mansion should have one: A Maid Aquarium!  Mitzi has had one installed on her landing, and Hexenhäusli Device's should be finished by the end of the year.

July

Blogorati : An exodus from Wordpress (back) to Blogger with Peenee being pushed, Ms Scarlet couldn't sit still, and Dinah still dithering.

 

Quote : "Mr Devine’s sideboard is a thing of beauty!!" ~ This is the correct answer, Ms Scarlet.  You win!

Music : "Admiral!  There be whales here!"  In this exhilarating clip from Fantasia 2000, Humpback whales take to the skies accompanied by Pines of Rome, by Ottorino Respighi.

August

Blogorati : Evidence of the reclusive and rare Lesser Striped* Very Mistress was found at The Woods Campground by Mistress Maddie.

 

 

 

* Obviously, if she'd kept her knickers tights on, she'd be the Greater or Majestic Striped Very Mistress!

Quote : "Please Make It Wear Big Pants and a Knitting Pattern Would Be Nice..." made a triumphant, if Sideboard squashing return, in an attempt to see off the whippersnapper "WOW, YOU LOOK GLAM!!  EVEN WITHOUT NAIL VARNISH YOU'D LOOK LIKE A MOVIE STAR!!"!

 

 Unfortunately for "... Make It Wear Big Pants...", "WOW, YOU LOOK GLAM..." proved to be a hit with several of the Blogorati, and its lustre lingered longer this year.  However, "... Make It Wear Big Pants..." has proved that it has staying power over the years and will almost certainly appear in the future, but either way, Ms Scarlet has won.  Again!

September

Ms Nations : "Tiny Kitchen VEGETAL action 3000 DANGER" (includes "DEATH SAUCE 3000 RECIPE!!!!!!HOLY SHIT WOW")

 

Travel Totty : Peenee took us for a walk in San Francisco where we got lost in "the world's most gigantic bougainvillea"!

 

 Fortunately, one of his mens was nearby to helpfully point the way home.  And, look: no hands!

 

Art Totty : Just a selection of (mostly) 2D hotties accented by the colour blue (except adorable Andorian Ensign #1 who doesn't need accents as cha is already blue - as seen back in March).

Music : "Love Invention" (Boys' Shorts Total Attraction Remix) by Alison Goldfrapp might just be my song of the year!  (From the same post as the 2D hotties on the right, and narrowly beating May's "Padam Padam" by Princess Kylie and "Down to One" by Bright Light Bright Light as seen in October, below)

 

 

October

BeefCake Totty : After another walk, Peenee baked a cake which was followed, oddly enough, by a beef course.  One of the dishes turned out to be none other than Gavin the Gardener who would go on to co-star in Terrifying Triffidery later in the month.

Homes & Gardens : The Crystal Disco Ball of Unsealed Fate was unearthed!

 

Quote : "Fuck" ~ Winnie the Pooh at Jon's.

 

Music : Jon's Euterpean Mood gave us new songs from Bananarama and OMD amongst others, but my very favourite and most played was - and still is - "Down to One" by Bright Light Bright Light.

 

 The video is rather fab, too!  (you can see for yourselves below)

Event : Terrifying Triffidery on Hallowe'en, of course!

November

Event : Why, none other than...

the 2023

I N F O M A N I A C

Garden Photos Event

 

With entries from (clockwise from top left): Peenee, Ms Proxima, Jon & Madam A, Ms Scarlet, Dinah, Mago, me, Mr Tonking, Mitzi, Maddie, The Very Mistress herself, and Savvy!

 

Music : and "kooky choreography" thanks to Melanie (and to Jon in December for the reminder)

December

Event : The long awaited (by some, if not many) Freakin' Green Elf Short Caption Competition returned at Janie Junebug's place, and Rimpy Rimpington won!

 

 The latest FGES Travel Map can be found here.

Travel : Mistress Maddie whisked us off to Capri.  Utterly gorgeous!

Familiar : Of absolutely no use in helping to put this review together, and having been a veritable time sink throughout the year, may I present Bertie Biteface looking like butter wouldn't melt at Felbrigg, and flaked out on my bed on Xmas Eve with his latest posession: The Mother's gardening glove.

Blogorati Event : The Most Inconsiderate Birthday Award, as ever, goes to dear Savvy. 

 

Happy New Year's Eve birthday, Savvy!

 And a Happy New Year to ALL the marvellous Blogorati who loiter, linger, and lurk here!

 

Music : Let's have some music to play us out: "Rain Down Love" by the Freemasons

Oh, and Corgis by Norma (of course)

. : . : . : .

 Oof!  Made it.  Now, we hope you've been paying attention because the first post of the New Year will be a quiz!  Yes, it's the return of the "Did I Win Yet?" Award/Quiz/Competition/Event/Festival thingy!

 Which was supposed to have been held in 2022 after we won (eventually) Ms Scarlet's edition in 2021, but, well...

 Anyway, as with the original quiz, almost all the answers can be found in this very post without having to click on any links, or wade through the entirety of 2023s blog posts.  So, we hope you've taken it all in, and we'll see you for the quiz in 2024!