Saturday, January 27, 2007

Monsters

You'll be pleased to know that we've fully recovered from last night's little incident.

I always forget that, while the four minds each take an equal burden of the ravages of alcohol, there's only the one body. Hence the stumbling, lack of hand/eye coordination, swearing and breath - sorry SID.

Now. Apologies to those whose Blogs I careered incoherantly through on the way home. At least I didn't vomit in them, eh?

One good thing has come from all this. I'll be safe from Monsters Under The Bed for a good while. They can't tolerate alcohol, you see. It reacts with their [insert poisonous chemical here*] for blood, causing them to explode. Which explains why only children - at least those not brought up on some vile estate - and the teetotal are plagued by the hideous creatures. I think I'd imbibed so much wine last night that they'll be gone for a good long while to ensure every trace of alcohol has left my system.

Right. Off to do something menial and soothing. Like the shopping list...



* I'm not a bloody chemist!

11 comments:

  1. I hope you will also apologise for asking me once more for sexual favours! I did the blowing thing you like once - and that is enough - also the more dangerous mutants were angry!

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  2. Christ Mutley, now I have images in my head that no one should ever have to experience. You'll be receivng my therapy bill.

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  3. I'm teetotal, but no monsters under my bed - I think they got tired of me slamming alarm clocks on their heads...

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  4. Aww, IDV, i'm just glad you had a good night. And I enjoyed the drunkish postings, which is bad, because it will probably encourage me to do the same.

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  5. Oooh-er! I go away for a few days and all manner of sauciness goes down!

    Oh and FYI I don't drink anymore and I definitely have monsters under the bed, but only when I am really overtired.

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  6. *laffs thinking about the mileage I'll get out of this one on Monday's "Blogging Roundup"*

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  7. *shuffles feet* It's been a while, hasn't it?

    Um, there are no monsters under my bed these days either, but even so, I'd rather have them than a mirror me. I mean, oh the horror! Can't imagine leaving the house without a good half hour of grooming... but I imagine it'd be easier for me to borrow concealer from someone at work than you :)

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  8. I'm planning on getting drunk tonight.

    I wonder where I might end up visiting and what words will escape via the fingertips?

    Drunken cunt(s).

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  9. Mutley: But I thought you liked it?

    Fuckkit: I expect those images are like a divine vision - So much so that they sent you mad(er)?

    Tim: I'll have to invest in a good sturdy alarm clock should I ever lay off the booze...

    Bwah hah hah hah haha ha!

    DinahI'm looking forward to you skidding and careening through Blogland in a haze of alcohol fumes!

    T-BirdA good swat with a broom, or even you monkey whip, will get rid of the blighters.

    MJ: * cringes in anticipation *

    Imogen: There you are young lady!

    Luckily, I do have quite a good Hag at work for those sort of emergencies.

    Skillz: Excellent! I'll know where to come when I need help combining my more explosive ingredients.

    P&T: Well, they can't be any worse than your normal expletive flinging. Can they?

    If you do end up crashing through Blogland, try and get to mine earlier rather than later, as it's usually later that the vom starts to fly...

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  10. MJ..See me for the full story.

    IDV you were perfectly & pleasantly polaxed.

    Very entertaining.


    And no I can't.

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