Sunday 5 November 2006

Sharp prick

I found myself on hands and knees on the bathroom floor the other night.

And you can stop those thoughts right there!

Honestly, feed you a line and you gobble it down like you haven't eaten in a week.

Lawks! etc. etc...

Anyway, there I was, painstakingly locating and retrieving all the bits of finger and toenail that I'd accidently spread all over the floor with a flick of the towel*, when the light was suddenly obscured.

"What the...?" I exclaimed, looking up. "Oh."

"Hello" the light obscurer said. "Sorry to just turn up like this."

I squinted as I looked into the eyes of my visitor, then recognition kicked in. "Hmmm... You could've waited a few minutes - I'm not dressed."

"Yes. I can see" my visitor admitted, wincing slightly.

"Hey! I don't know what that look was for?"

"What do you mean? What 'look'?"

"That wincing look." I was getting mildly annoyed now. "You've been in me before - you should be familiar with this."

"Yes. Well. That was a long time ago."

"Speaking of which, when are you coming from?"

"2257."

"Ah. That would explain the ridiculous get-up."

My visitor just looked down his nose at me before saying "I expect you want to know what I'm doing here?"

Funnily enough, I didn't. And I told him so. "No."

"Not even a little curious?" he asked.

"Look. I'm hot, tired and naked" I replied. "I'm more curious about my bed."

"Well, you haven't got the luxury of sleep. At least not yet."


Continued in... Ouch!


* This might be TMI, but I find it easier to clip finger & toenails during or after a bath as the hot water makes them softer and easier to cut. I usually collect as I clip and leave them in a little pile on the edge of the bath rather than leave them rolling around at the bottom of the bath - there's nothing worse than feeling a sharp prick in one's bum when wallowing around in the bath...

9 comments:

  1. Yes, a sharp prick indeed. No-one wants that to happen....

    I see the method in the madness though.

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  2. "You've been in me before - you should be familair with this"

    Oo Er Missus! have I missed a posting?

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  3. It's often during a nice bubble bath that I often contemplate how nice a sharp prick would be...

    ...each to their own, eh?

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  4. "Look. I'm hot, tired and naked" I replied. "I'm more curious about my bed."

    I'm totally stealing that for everyday use. Especially when I'm cold and clothed, just to confuse 'em.

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  5. Of course not. The very idea, Dora. But what if it wasn't quite so sharp?

    Not yet Frobi. Be sure to catch the next one - all will be explained. Vaguely.

    I've pushed the prissyness aside and I'm with you on this one, Miss T!

    Dinah
    : The very next time someone asks if you're curious about something, you've got to say it. Then post about it. Yay!

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  6. ... however, a nice big blunt prick in your behind is another matter entirely.

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  7. Thank you Qenny. We were beating around the bush somewhat (I hope that wasn't a euphemism for vaginal violence?)!

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  8. It's often during a nice hot bath I contemplate how good a beating around the bush might be.

    I almost didn't post this, but I snorted some wine out my nose, and hopefully someone else will too. Either in laughter or disgust, it's all the same to me...

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  9. Live dangerously miss t. Don't beat around the bush when you need a beating around the bush.

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Tickle my fancy, why don't you?