Those vile, green, ribbed-for-your-pleasure, posterior-pleasers - and, no, I'm not talking about those Freakin' Green Elf Shorts (currently awaiting their debut in Ms Scarlet's clutches) - have escaped their imprisonment from the attic of Castlette DeVice!
Run, Very Mistress. Run!One of the pair languished in the attic for over six years, the other one for about three or four years (we agreed to a plea bargain in which it was granted sitting status, but only for Ming [mayherestinpeace] - as the white and grey hairs wedged into the nooks and crannies attested to). They saw an opportunity after Inexcuseable's Husband (seen here fending off moist bints) left the attic trapdoor unlocked (possibly on purpose), and I, innocent to the plot, turned up to poach the Wifi. After grappling with emails and WhatsApps, I returned to Car and found, to my horror, the tiresome tubular chairs relaxing on the back seat!
It's here I realise that I should have taken photographic evidence to illustrate this invasion of green - somewhat like this prior encounter, but not this one (as it is in black and white...) - an oversight I regret now.Despite much foot stamping and threats of thaumatalurgical violence, the hollow-framed horrors just smiled - a disconcerting expression on a pair of fifty year old (or thereabouts) corduroy chairs - and bade me to transport them to their new home at the DeVice Mansion.
Here they are in their new habitat. Arrogant sods.
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| Blatant in the boudoir |
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| Lurking in the office |
You may note the swatch of curtain fabric (an Art Deco print called Clifton) draped - artfully, I hope, but not as good as Ms Scarlet could do as she is the master (mistress?) of placing things on chairs - over the headrest of the instigator of this diabolical scheme. Lovely, isn't it? And, somewhat typically and rather irritatingly, one of the most expensive fabrics that John Lewis (a department store, for those not in the know) offer! Of course, now that I've seen it, I simply must have it.
Oh. Er. I'm doing this from work, so if I don't manage to get around to visit your blogs this week, it's because work got in the way. I'll try and get to replying to your comments from the previous post later..
oOo
I'll leave you with this rather haunting piano track, Memories of Green by Vangelis, from which I nabbed the title of this post.
Oh dear. I hope you're not planning a bathroom suite to match? Jx
ReplyDeleteOh, er... No.
Delete*quickly cancels order *
The chairs look comfy. Will they be re-upholstered in Art Deco as well?
ReplyDeleteNot at £35 a metre they won't be!
DeleteYes - green, orange, a certain yellow, and a brown. These colours were typical - early seventies ?
ReplyDeleteIn a rare case of divergent opinion I do not think that they look, or are, comfy chairs, but back breaking torture instruments. They may serve as "silent butler", vulgo Klamottenstuhl.
I must admit, one does have to sit in them in a certain way in order not to get back/bum ache. And even in the optimum position, anything longer than two hours is too much!
DeleteMy gran had something very similar in mustard I can still see it in my mind's eye, she had orange cushions too with turquoise rhombi on them. Are you going to have antimacassars made hence the swatch?
ReplyDeleteYour gran sounds like she had her finger on the fashion pulse!
DeleteLove the fabric, but I'm more of a solid color kinda gal. xoxo
ReplyDeleteAh. Big, bold swathes of colour chez Savannah, eh?
DeleteThe chairs look quite at home and inviting. Have you treated them to protect them from spills? And how comfy are they? The Art Deco print looks lovely.
ReplyDeleteThe links to the previous posts make me wonder: Is Gerbil Device still alive? What about the other familiars?
The chairs are treated as museum pieces - i.e. no one but me (and especially not Vom Smallhausen) is allowed to sit on them. And I swallow, not spill!
DeleteGerbil DeVice sadly carked it within a year or so of those photos being taken. As for the other familiars, Ming is also no more (he didn't choke to death on Gerbil DeVice, btw), but Cedplop certainly is. As is Beaky, his wife, offspring, and clones!
You can't have Clifton curtains, John Lewis only has two metres in stock, unless you have small windows.
ReplyDeleteI suspect your green chairs would benefit from being termed vintage and sold to hipsters at a huge profit?
I was quite perturbed when I clicked the link and found out that you weren't mucking about. Luckily, the firm that makes the fabric for JL had 260 metres available - Just enough to do all the upstairs windows in the DeVice Mansion (with enough left for one - not two, mind - of those antimacassars that Mitzi was going on about).
DeleteI did try to find out how much those chairs are worth, but couldn't find anything online. They're probably priceless. No. That's not the word. What is it? Oh, yes: worthless.
Happy belated birthday in your new home! May it bring you a new hot postman or delivery boy.
ReplyDeleteWhy, thank you Hound! Luckily, as the new house is only up the road from the old one, I get to keep my existing surly, hot postman!
DeleteThe chairs...trying to be all Bauhaus, perhaps? My thought was that they'd probably be a hit with the hipster//yuppie crew, seeing as it's Bauhaus Centenary.
ReplyDeleteMy back goes into spasm just looking at them.
I vaguely recall learning about Bauhaus while in art school, but most of it escapes me now. I might have to do some re-reading.
DeleteI wonder how much of my other junk I can off-load onto gullible hipsters?
Those chairs are comfortable for about 45 minutes. Anything longer than an hour requires a lot of fidgeting.