Thursday, 22 March 2007

On this day...

... in 1931, William Shatner was born.

... in 1975, the Host was born. Angels sang, rivers ran with wine, and Darwinian evolution came to a halt as it's pinnacle had been reached! Or something. Little did he know IDV would be dropping in 30 years down the line.

... in 2007, IDV stares into his crystal ball to see what kind of cake The Mother has made him. Instead, he sees this timeline. Bugger.

... in 2011, IDV's secret* errand for
Tim, to obtain a sample of The Shat's DNA for nefarious cloning purposes, goes hideously wrong. He is catapulted into the future, to 2230, where one of Winona Kirk's eggs is accidently fertilised with the appropriated DNA.

... in 2231, Captain**
James Tiberius Kirk is born. The rest will be history.

Or will it?

* Oops! Sorry Tim. Not so secret now...
** Obviously, he's not born as a captain. For a start, his rank insignia would have torn something on the way out. Look how pointy it is:


  1. Happy Birthday to the Host with the most!

    William Shatner is Canada's gift to the world.

  2. Anonymous22/3/07 12:31

    He would wear it on his nappy! Does anyone else find this a surprising history? I do.

  3. Anonymous22/3/07 17:37

    Oh, it's like Cloud Atlas with knobs on!

  4. Anonymous22/3/07 18:00

    Oh? How did we forget a birthday?



    I hope you wake in the morning, at the breakfast table, with your head slumped into a bowl of banana jelly.

    And discover Car is missing some tyres.

    Do we get a slice of cake?

  5. Oh my god! The host shares a birthday with the mighty Shat!?

    Happy Shatday!

    I mean: Shatty birthday!!

    No, wait: Happy birthshat!!!


    Shatty Shat-Shat!!!!

    Oh, bugger it. You know what I mean. Hope you've had/have an amaaaaazing day!

  6. Happy Birthday. IDV!!

    Twenty Twelve eh? Life begins at twenty twelve, doesn't it?!

    Hope you had a great day! XX

  7. Happy Birthday IDV!

    Hope you had a fabulous day, and I hope you got something rude ;)

  8. MJ: And what a gift it is!

    Mutley: Of course! Why didn't I think of that?

    Qenny: Huh?
    * furiously googles Cloud Atlas *
    Ohhhh, thank you.

    P&T: How? Because you're rubbish?

    Anyway (takes favourite word in vain), here's some 'cake'. Those aren't Fuckkit's fingerprints in it, just ignore the indentations. Enjoy!

    Tim: My day was abShatlutely Shatastic!

    T-Bird: It does indeed. I should know, this is my 16th time around!

    Cyberpete: Yay! You're alive!

    Nothing rude yet, but there's still an hour and twenty minutes to go...

    Maybe Knight will pop 'round?

  9. Anonymous22/3/07 23:37

    What you need for your birthday (there's still 24 minutes of it left) is a nice big cock up your arse.

    Maybe MJ could oblige?

  10. It´s aliiiiiiiiiiiive! Yup, still kicking.

    P & T: Well said! I agree.

    So....? Did Knight swing by?

  11. Oops! happy belated birthday

  12. P&T: MJ only had the kettle-dildo left, but she had just made a cuppa so it was too hot.

    Cyberpete: No he didn't, the inconsiderate sod!

    Frobi: Oops!? What? Because you intercepted Knight before he got to my place? He's a sucker for long hair - I hope you weren't wearing that wig?!

  13. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaappy Birrrrrrrrthday! belated.

  14. Happy birthday Device dear!

    Word verification: infut.

    infut exclaimation noise made by shaggee when attempting to mutter 'you're kneeling on my arm' coincides with thrust from shagger of precisely the right angle to induce feeling of being at one with the universe and all of time.

  15. Spike darling! You came! Well, not literally I assume?

    I shall look forward to the infut moment.

    Oh, and don't mind Dinah. She'd had a little too much vodka...

  16. How on earth did I miss this post and your birthday? Happy belated! I hope that it was suitably fabulous.

  17. Don't worry I wiped up after.


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