You made it. Splendid. Welcome to the fifth annual Terrifying Triffidery show!
The hors d'oeuvres are here!
Hang on... I didn't think we were serving our Bloggerati guests with food?
We're not. We're serving them as food! The triffids are getting peckish and without Gavin and his monstrous arms we have no way to hold them back.
We are NOT feeding our guests to a load of house plants with ideas above their station! And where is Gavin? I haven't seen him since last year.
Christ!
What's Witchface talking about?
We don't have any staff.
Unless you count the woodsman?
I hope he's changing out of that horrid flannel shirt...
Right. Let's have some music to accompany our tour. Oh, and remember to keep all your appendages on this side of the velvet rope - unless you don't need them, that is. And some of the triffids' tendrils and tentacles are quite long, so be on your guard.
TT#1 : Who sent in these horrible, horrible little mouths full of teeth?!?
TT#2 : Roll out the red carpet - Audrey II has arrived!
TT#3 : Yaaaaaaarrgh! Moss Monsters!!
TT#4 : A dragon's head?
TT#5 : Bats! Bats!! Or are they more horrible, horrible teeth?
TT#6 : Would whoever left this interdimensional fissure open please close it before whatever it is that's coming through comes through!
TT#7 : Oh, good. Just what we need: Tentacles.
TT#8 : Mouldy old severed limb, anyone? No? Can't please some people.
TT#9 : Oh, Christ. Tapeworm city!
TT#10 : Purple, people-eating penguins perhaps?
Did you all make it through unscathed? Or at least in one piece?
Yes? Drat! That means I'll have to find some more people to feed to these triffids.
Don't mind Witchface. We hope you've had fun perusing the specimens - can you guess who snapped each Triffid and what seemingly benign plant they were propogated from? While you think about it, have some rather more upbeat music to accompany your comments. And remember to pop back for the main event which starts in a couple of days time!
EDIT 18:30 - A clue to matching up who sent what: These triffids were supplied by the Bloggerati named on the poster at the top of this post (and some palmed off more than one). They are (as their names are not that clear): Jon & Madam Arcati, Dinah, Melanie, Mistress Maddie, Ms Scarlet, Mr Tonking, and me. Good luck with your guesses!
Eek! Some of these are truly horrible! I'd guess the "tapeworms" were something exotic from Dinah's sub-tropical garden, and the "interdimensional fissure" and "tentacles" to be one of your lilies, possibly. Would the "bats" and (possibly) "the severed limb" be from Mads, perchance? [The latter looks like a pumpkin stalk.]
ReplyDeleteCan't wait for the "big reveal"... Jx
I'm taking a stab that #4 is yours Jon. And I feel like Dinah, Mitzi and Melanie must have an entry here......
DeleteThere is one right answer amongst your guesses Jon and Maddie. Well, mainly in Jon's...
DeleteBut, yes, Dinah and Melanie have supplied triffids, but Mitzi has not.
I'm not sure by any of it. But I feel as though I need a shower. I feel like I have critters crawling all over me now...... be back in a jif.......
ReplyDeleteLet me know if you need a hand scrubbing your back!
DeleteOh dear...I'm not sure I even recognise mine! But wait! I can explain that...some of my plants give off a very intoxicating scent which, in my case, can cause memory-muddle.
ReplyDeleteBut we're off to a good start, aren't we!
Christ! I hope you didn't put your nose too close to your triffid, Dinah?!
DeleteBut, yes, a very good start!
I love the terrifying triffid befuddlement - just the thing to help me out of my stupor. I think TT2 is Jon - and that's only a weak hunch.
ReplyDeleteAll wonderful and wouldn't look out of place in a very scary garden.
Sx
Ah, Ms Scarlet - I'm so pleased to see you! And I think you might be on to something with your hunch...
DeleteP.S. If the triffid befuddlement starts to wear off, might I suggest switching to sudoku? I find it very engaging and soothing.
The only thing terrifying is that alien language you're trying to pass off as Japanese! You already know I was Big in Japan. Here's Tom Waits version of Big in Japan. I like both songs though. https://youtu.be/NM60iVDu79Y?si=ichMzZS8mEqTuOL6
ReplyDeleteI don't have the capacity for determining who sent what, but the tentacle plant is likely an orchid, I think. I wouldn't know personally, but apparently some people have kink about tentacles.
Thanks for not feeding us to the plants! A velvet rope, while stylish, is rather Darwinian of you. You are not going to coddle us with dangerous specimens behind plexiglass. As your lawyer's representative, I must insist that a waiver of liability be signed before anyone is allowed through the black velvet curtains to the exhibit.
Now excuse me as I try to cure this headache and go assure all of Japan you meant no offense. If you'd like to apologize personally your apology is best served alongside visuals of cute kittens and puppies. Capybaras are also quite popular.
Hah haaa! Yes, the 'Zaibatsu' typeface was just a means to an end - and the only English one in my limited library that looked even vaguely similar to Japanese (from a great distance and while squinting) and was just about readable. Incidentally, I've just googled zaibatsu and learned that it means "financial clique".
DeleteThe TT poster was inspired by the Japanese edition of the Star Trek IV movie poster (which I covet).
Now, as for reparations to Japan. I am preparing a contingent of puppies as I type. I will also see about obtaining some kittens for the more deviant members of society (relevant bit from 36 seconds in - it's the first thing I thought of when I read your final paragraph.).
P.S. 'Zaibatsu' reminds me more of certain Mi'kmaw hieroglyphs than it does Japanese characters.
DeleteI can only hope that Star Trek Lower Decks comes to a streaming service we have soon! That episode reminds me of the kind of raunchy Anime we like from Archer.
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