Friday, 23 March 2018

12,000 Years of The House of Infomaniac

Continued from Still Twitching
Which followed on from It's That Time of Year...
Which was itself continued, sort of, from In Space, No One Can Hear You Peep

 After everyone had recovered from The Very Mistress's dramatic debut - and downed copious amounts of alcohol - they staggered from the veranda to the courtyard.
 "Well?" The Very Mistress asked, gazing upon the spacious and quite empty area. "Where is it?"
 "Ummm... Someone" L said giving Mago the side-eye, "switched on the cloaking device, and now we can't find the button to turn it off, so you'll have to make do with these design sketches instead."
 The Very Mistress snatched the papers from LẌ.
 "What is this?  What is it?" she asked.
 "You've got it upside down" IDV pointed out.
 "Flaming uterus class?" Her face reddening in rage, The Very Mistress 'asked' again: "Flaming Uterus class?!?"  Thunder clouds began to gather overhead.

Her Very Mistress's Starship Infomaniac (Flaming Uterus-class)

 In a state of panic, Ms Scarlet began reading the starship naming ceremony cue cards, hoping to gloss over the storm.
 "To celebrate twelve million years of-"
 "Thousand" IDV hissed. "Twelve thousand years!  You're making it worse!"
 "Actually" The Very Mistress glowered, "it's only been twelve years."
 "Mein Gott!  As little as that?"  Mago took another swig of his drink.  
 "Ah.  Oh.  Well then" continued a flustered Ms Scarlet.  "To celebrate only twelve years of the House of Infomaniac, I name this ship, er, Infomaniac!"  And she fished her emergency bottle of Babycham from her handbag and flung it bodily towards the centre of the courtyard.
 With a smash that made everyone jump, the bottle shattered against the invisible hull of the cloaked starship.  Rivulets of Babycham trickled over its curves, giving away it's shape. 
 "May the gods bless her and all who sail in her"  Ms Scarlet cried. 
 "Congratulations Very Mistress!" everyone shouted.


 From a porthole in the side of the ship, two droids stared out of the Babycham covered glass.
 "You know we're going to have to clear it all up, don't you?" C3-Peenee said.
 "Beep boop" replied Norma-D2.

To be continued (at some point - if I can be bothered) in...
Cusp Trek VII: The Hexed Generation


 This post is brought to you exactly 12 years to the day, hour and minute* that Infomaniac burst upon our screens (rather like a festering boil or carbuncle that had reached the point of no return).  Adjusted** for time zones, obviously...

* The hour and minute are really important, as that gave me an extra fourteen hours (nearly) to finish this post.  Yes, I left it until the last minute again, and was rudely distracted from my work on it by family wishing me happy birthday.
** I was going to post this at 7:51 pm UK time which is 1:51pm Canadian time (I think), but I finished this sooner than I expected, so thought it better to post it sooner rather than later.


  1. Blimey, if there was an overdose of information in 2006 what the hell do we have now.... AND, what baffled and confused state will we be in by 2030.... er... that was a scary year to type.
    Meanwhile, CONGRATULATIONS MS MISTRESS!!!!!! for an absolutely fabulous 12 years!!!!

    1. In 2030 (it sounds so far off, but really isn't :( ) I shall have abandoned electronic media and will be living in a cave chiselling spells into a stone tablet.
      Or, living on the beach after Chateau DeVice fell off the cliff!

    2. Don't you have some sort of crystal ball we can peer into to see where we'll all be in 2030?

    3. Well, yes, but I'd feel a bit hypocritical using it now - see my earlier reply to Mago below.

      Although, we could leave it a few days then give it a go!

  2. If I were you, I'd watch my back.

    1. I'm scared, Norma. She's arrived and has been... Oh, what's the word? Nice!

    2. Nice? Only because my uterus isn't aflame at the moment.

    3. * breathes sigh of relief and wonders what else we can get away with *

  3. Twelve years ago is such a reach into the mists of time that I'd forgotten my first post! Not to mention the exact time of day I hit the "Publish" button.

    Bless you for bringing it all back for me.

    1. Ug. It's all coming back to me now, too. Twelve years ago I was young! ish...

    2. Just to make us all feel a bit old, 2006 was the year Daniel Craig debuted as James Bond, Mike Baldwin died in Corrie, Pauline Fowler died in Eastenders, and Gnarls Barkley, Scissor Sisters, Leona Lewis and Shakira were the biggest selling UK artists... Jx

    3. I was crazy for the Scissor Sisters that year. "Filthy Gorgeous" was my song.

    4. No surprises there. Jx

    5. Love those Scissor Sisters!

  4. Anonymous23/3/18 17:56

    We should ask a stargazer, or better someone who is able to do the horoscope, a seer, because we have the unusual situation that not only date, but exact time and place are known, so the exact stellar constellations should be not difficult to reconstruct - a horoscope : What's in the stars for The Infomaniac ?!
    There's the glorious past, there's the even brighter future !
    And btw I blame the button designer - it just had to be hit !

    1. A horoscope? Seeing into the future? This sounds like witchcraft to me...

      A witch! A witch! Burn him at the stake!


      Excuse me. Just deflecting a little bit.

      P.S. Those lovely jewelled buttons look good enough to eat, never mind just touch!

  5. Twelve years? That must make you one of the Old Stalwarts, ma'am.We seem to be a dying breed...

    1. We're like the blogger equivalent of cockroaches - we keep on surviving!

  6. "Damn it, Jim, I am a doctor but please don't make me deal with a flaming uterus." — Dr McCoy Star Trek "The Troubles With Uteri"

    Happy Blogiversary MJ!

  7. Happy Birthday and Congratulations, Infomaniac!!!


    Cheers and Best Wishes for many more years of laughter, fun, and good company!


    1. You seem to have a never ending supply of cake and pop, Eros. Which is a good thing!

  8. SWEET MARY SUNSHINE, but I have missed everything this past week!!! Happy Birthday, sweetpea!! Now I must rush over to The Mistress and pray she'll overlook my tardiness and not inflict too much on my poor worthless soul...*mmmm* xoxoxo

    1. It's a good job another tin foil hat compo wasn't being held...

    2. Actually it was and I won.
      Congratulations to The Mistress!


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