Well. It wasn't Man Flu™. Or even Space Flu™. I've only gone and caught Vampiritis.
IDV is NOT happy, but I can't really see what all the fuss is about.
I don't think I've got the Code V strain because I can still go out in daylight, although I find myself squinting quite a lot and the Factor 30 does seem to soothe my skin. I also seem to have an aversion to recording devices like phones, cameras etc. and my reflection has become somewhat ghostly, too. I still like garlic, though, and churches/crucifixes give me a hot tingly feeling which isn't entirely unpleasant...
Oh. And then there's the whole 'blood thing'. While I don't crave it, I do seem to be fixated on carotid arteries - Pay me no heed if I don't meet your eye while you're talking to me. My canines do seem to have lengthened somewhat - just in case I suppose - which would explain why my wiggling ex has taken to calling me Fangford!
I think I must have caught it three or four weeks ago during a 'dalliance' with the DeVize's*. Before you all scream incest, 260 years worth of generational deviance separates me from those two. I'm probably more related to you than them!
Now that I've got it, I don't quite know what to do with it. Obviously, I'm sophisticated elegance incarnate. Slick, stylish and demonically handsome. I just hope it lasts...
* Immolation and Infernal DeVize. They first appeared here.
However butch Man Flu sounds I must say Vampiritis sounds like it has a bit more bite.
ReplyDeleteGarlic helps getting rid of so many things, maybe Vampiritis too? Of course I'm not a specialist in this area.
I'm still looking for a cure to the horrible 'delete button' syndrom.
I think this suaveness should most definitely be used on freaking out nosey persons who are not part of the witchy bitchy blog world...
ReplyDeleteOh, and I'd be rocking that hot tingly feeling Madonna stylee, if I were you ;-)
Hee. Fangford.
ReplyDelete