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| Knobs |
"That isn't a real beach" declared
Hound, of my previous post.
"I can tell because there isn't a single condom, needle, nappy, dead animal or chav in sight. It's a sort of John Lewis fantasy of a beach."
Rubbish, I say. With knobs on! Of course this is a real beach. Why, just look what I've found for you this morning, Hound. Rubbish with knobs on. Oh, and some graffiti at the end.
But first...
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| Nice morning for it |
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| Glinting, glimmering high tide |
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| A drowned groyne |
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| We'll have to follow the revetment at the end of the promenade to find any rubbish |
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| Through we go... |
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| ... and out the other side, looking back |
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| Behind the revetment lie the fantasy killers, such as this discarded container... |
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| ... and this plastic bottle... |
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| ... and this, uh, biodegradable lemon peel. Is this it? Is this the best we can do? |
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| What about these polystyrene packing puffs? Wait a minute... These aren't rubbish, they're whelk egg cases! |
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| I hardly think a bit of smashed up revetment counts as rubbish. |
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| Well That's it. That's all the rubbish I could find. Perhaps there'll be more when the tide goes out? |
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| Hang on. We almost forgot about the knobs. |
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| "Knobs! Faahsands ov'em!" Well, a few, at any rate |
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| Ready for your close-up? |
oOo
And here's the graffiti:
If I didn't know better*, I'd suspect that
Ms Scarlet woz 'ere...
*
I'm sure any graffiti left by Ms Scarlet would be better than this. And there'd be capital H & E!
I actually like the knobs! I think you should take them home and make them into a sculptural garden feature, they would give Beaky somewhere to rest his legs.
ReplyDeleteAND NOW I KNOW WHERE CHARMAINE HAS GONE!!!! Expect a chubby teenage girl to be knocking on your door in 15 minutes time. She had been longing to travel far and wide, but before she set off I confiscated her nibs; looks like she's improvised with chalk on stone. It's okay, it'll come clean with a bit of spit and a hanky.
Sx
Sorry it's taken a while to respond - it's taken until now to get rid of Charmaine. Blimey! She's a one, isn't she. And possibly a two, too.
DeleteI quite like the knobs, too, but youy've already given me all the reason I need not to drag them home: I don't want to encourage Beaky to spend any longer than necessary in my general vicinity.
See the stone set with graffiti
ReplyDeleteSee the revetment twist by our side
I wait for rubbish
Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of knobs he makes us wait
And I wait for rubbish
With or without rubbish
With or without rubbish
Through the storm we reach the groyne
You give it all but we want more
And I'm waiting for rubbish
With or without rubbish
With or without rubbish
You, too, LẌ?
DeleteWhelk egg cases are like something out of an alien film, aren't they? I remember finding them while rock-pooling when I was a kiddiewinky, and being at once horrified and fascinated...
ReplyDelete...and your massive knob-fest is certainly very appealing! Jx
Well, when it comes to massive knobs, why stop at one?!
DeleteThe whelk eggs really are quite bizarre. Don't look too closely at them though - something might pop out and launch itself at your face!
I vaguely thought whelks were related to leeks. Hmm. And I agree with Scarlet, you should repurpose the knobchitecture as garden art pronto.
ReplyDeleteI'd look carefully at the next chicken and leek pie (or potato and leek soup) that's laid before you, mrpeenee...
DeleteI'm going to return to the beach this weekend and see whether I can prise that knob encrusted wood from those rocks. Although, even if I can, I doubt I'll manage to get it up the cliff as it's bloody massive!
Goodness even the rubbish has been delivered by Waitrose. An empty mineral water bottle, and I swear that's organic quinoa and Himalayan salt I can see.
ReplyDeleteNice to see you haven't lost your edge and can still do a mean graf if your bloods want you to.
I agree about the knobs, but I think you should hire a stall at Moseley flea market and sell it for quids in.
This is not just any rubbish. This is M&S- wait. Wrong shop.
DeleteI have to admit, it took me quite a while (ande several re-reads) to understand your "graf" and "bloods" comment. I wondered what on Earth you were going on about at first. Oh dear...
Knobs! You nailed it!
ReplyDeleteI'm going to take a camera and find something "intriguing" for you...
Ha ha haaa!! I can't wait to see what mysterious object you might capture with your camera!
Delete