Wednesday, 17 April 2019

Mid-Week Muscles : Pondering Cleanliness

 I was looking through my draft posts (22 of them!) to see if I had something almost finished that I could "touch up" and post, so to speak, when I came across (not literally) this one from almost a year ago:

~ cue wobbly soap opera flashback effect ~
We have a new cleaner at work.  He is young and attractive.

26.04.2018 - After the most languorous yet insouciant display of vacuuming I have ever seen, followed by a nod 'hello', the new cleaner slowly and deliberately coiled up his vacuum cleaner cable while facing half-away from me.  The level of arrogant nonchalance with which he managed to instill in this simple action was quite remarkable. And hypnotic.  His muscles are quite impressive.

27.04.2018 - The muscular young cleaning youth did it again.  I think he may be on to me, though, as this time he deliberately faced me as I was sitting at my desk.  Having completed another seemingly languid and indolent pass of the horrid carpet tiles, he almost casually coiled that cable again, unnecessarily flexing his biceps and bouncing his pecs in my direction.  I didn't know where to look!  Well, I did, clearly...
To make things worse, he actually smiled at me a couple of times.  Not while doing his "routine", but in passing as he moved down the office.
He looks like this (John Hirka), only with less shirt-lifting (mores the pity)
Also, with less "I think I'm having a heart attack" after covering himself up...

04.05.2018 - I saw him again this morning.  Only fleetingly, however.  He had just finished flexing and bulging his way through coiling that cable again as I arrived in the office, then he drifted off down the office and into the next wing.

11.05.2018 - He came and vacuumed around my desk, totally flummoxing me.  He even spoke (just mildly flirtatious smalltalk).  He has an indeterminate accent - I think he's Eastern European?  Or American...
Anyway, he doesn't look quite so huge and imposing close up, but still pretty awesome, though!
Now.  If you'll excuse me.  I need an early night if I'm to be in work early again tomorrow!
~ wobbly flashback wobbles out of existence ~

 I'm not sure exactly why I didn't finish it off?  Possibly because I was hoping to get a photo of him to illustrate the post, or that I'd actually speak to him some more and get to know him a bit?  However, I didn't see him again.  I don't know what happened to him.  Moved on to a different cleaning contract, perhaps?  Or fired for being (or appearing) lazy and/or flirtatious?  Snapped up by a modelling agency?  Or whisked away by his Henry after it came to life and fell in love with him...?


 Anyway, while we're here and on this topic, here's a little (or big rather, as he's 6'3" apparently) something I discovered recently: Carl Logan Ponder* aka loponder7 (on Instagram)

Doesn't look hideous in socks and pants

He likes animals, and they seem to like him

He doesn't mind getting wet
Mistress Maddie?  He looks suspiciously like one of yours here...

He has musical talents
Click here to hear!

Good with kids and can rock a 'tache!
(Although not quite up to Tom Selleck standards...)

* At least, I think that's his name.  Other than his Instagram account, there seems to be precious little about him on the interwebs (plus, I can't be bothered to stalk much these days - all I got is that he's 27 (born mid-November 1991).


  1. I've had so many, It very well could be one of mine. They go awl sometimes don't you know. Now this lad on this your office cleaner!?!?!?! Oh my. God. If it best tell him right quick you have a few things that need polishing. Don't make me fly over there to snap you out of it!!!!!!!!

    1. The Instagram Boy is not my cleaner, unfortunately. If he was, I'd be constantly making messes!

  2. "I don't know what happened to him"

    He's pimping Dysons now.

    1. He might be pimping Dyson's now, but "He'll be back"!

  3. What, no large penis photo?

    1. Sorry, Norma. It was too big to fit in here.
      Besides, I've taken down my "adult content warning" sign to enable me to blog from work if needs must...

  4. Why has he put a black hole on that poor child's face? Appalling.
    How is your postman? I shall send you something that needs to be signed for.... we could all send you stuff that needs to be signed for!!!

    1. Oh, that was me. I conjured the black hole to obscure his niece's (?) face - I was inspired by your "Universe on a Chair"!

      Ooh, I'd love to have to sign for something. Especially as the weather is supposed to be much nicer in the coming week or so. My postman will probably be in his tight, red top!

  5. Nothing sucks like an Electrolux, apparently. I'm pondering Mr Ponder as we speak. Jx

  6. Dammit how do you do it? Our cleaner is an old rasta with three teeth who speaks patois but has never been out of Aston.
    You do like these ones who fancy themselves more than anyone else, don't you?

    1. Well, they're pretty to look at, but I don't think I'd like to go out with one. Not more than twice, anyway (never put out on the first date).

  7. As if being at work (which is different from working) isn't hard enough.

    1. Oh, I know, mrpeenee. The next thing you know, there'll be scantily clad tea boys, and the man who comes to fix the air con will have his top off!

  8. Or Mrs Mop "Can I do you now, Sir?"


Tickle my fancy, why don't you?