Tuesday, 26 January 2010

Scabby old bat

Can you smell burning?
It smells like burning hair.
Yuck. I hate that smell. Where's it coming from?
* sniff sniff * Over there. Look.
Where? Oh, yes. Is that a dragon?
Is it?!
Lawks! Let's get out of here.

Oh no you don't! We're here now and Moom's expecting a walk. I'm not letting some jumped up lizard dictate whereabouts I walk just because it can incinerate a mortal at one hundred paces.
And, besides, if something's burning, chances are that it's already eaten.
Exactly. Hopefully, it'll have eaten that dreadful cow who walks that ratty little Yorkshire terrier, or whatever it is.

Yes, well, I don't think we should go bounding up as bold as brass.

Yeah, let's just stick to the woods at the edge of the park.

Oh, don't be such babies. We're more than a match for some scaly, scabby old bat.

Careful! We're right out in the open, now.

It's looking right at us! Run away!

Wha-? Jinkies! Look at the size of it! Uh, I think we will walk in the woods, after all.

* squints into the mist * Ohforgodssakes. It's not a dragon: It's that old tree stump in the middle of the park, you dolts!

Then what's the burning smell?

* sniff sniff * Smells like weed. I bet it's those delinquent teenagers from the housing estate up the road. Bloody hooligans. Where's a dragon when you need one?


  1. Hah! I hate it when that happens. Some scary dude stalked me last Thursday. It wasn't fun or anything.

  2. Smells like weed?

    Surely it's Mr. Frobisher.

  3. You need to retrofit Moom with some fire-breathing apparatus.

  4. Ha! Those hooligans were puffing the magic dragon!

    Potheads are usually mellow and easy going. It's the crackheads you gotta look out for! Those mofos will steal from you! They're the kind you feed to a dragon!

  5. Maybe its a smell of rancid panty hose not smoke ??? and look who your first two commentors are!!!!

    Just floating a theory !

  6. You poor thing Mr de Vice

    I do hope that you are over your traumatic experience.

    Perhaps you will have better luck next time you go down to the woods.

    I Love taking my morning exercise in the woods and often find teddy bears picnicing.

    Though I do recall finding a bare Edward once.


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