Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Vexations

Did you know that nearly 75% of all 'ghosts' are still alive?

No? Well, they are. They're just silly sods having OOBEs* or they're Remote Viewing. And 99% of those are doing it unconsciously, either while dreaming or daydreaming.

You can imagine how crowded it is already, after all there're far more dead & undead people (and things) than living people (and things). All these extra astral forms dithering around the ether make unlife very frustrating for the other one percent of us.

I mean, hardly anyone indicates to make it clear which reality they're going to emerge into. Changing ether-strings without so much as a by-your-leave is most vexing, too. However, by far the worst culprits are those who run red lights, jamming up the sublayers causing massive spectral backlogs before all suddenly emerging into the same reality at once - More often than not, unwittingly dragging along other genuine ether-users. Invariably, they often emerge in some weak willed thing who has to be exorcised to get rid of all the extra souls scrabbling about for space in its consciousness.

* tut *

I'm taking a pair of scissors with me next time I go. I'll cut the link between the astral form and its body of whoever gets in my way. They can drift around for eternity learning some bloody manners, I hope.

Actually, there really ought to be some sort of exam or test one has to take before sliding into the ether. You know, something you have to do to get a license...



* Out Of Body Experiences, for those that didn't know. If you don't know what Remote Viewing is, I despair... Oh, all right. Have a look here.

12 comments:

  1. Yeay! I beat Fuckkit.

    Ghosts still alive?

    Blimey!

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  2. I'd love to be able to do that... but all my talents appear to lean towards the hag arena...

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  3. I'd nearly forgotten about Fuckkit, Tickers. I'd better pay her a visit. Now where did I put that cake?

    And what an arena it is, Miss T!

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  4. There was a tribe/cult in ancient Sumeria which used to believe in stuff.

    I dunno what.

    Do ghosts/astral projections take on the forms of the body at the time of passage, or are they free to choose any of their previous forms? And seeing as every atom in the human body changes every few years, then how can you say your identity is the same as that of you ten years ago?

    It's a bit like in Only Fools when Trigger said he got a medal for keeping his broom for 20 years, having changed the head 17 times and the handle 14 times. It clearly wasn't the same broom, and hence humour arouse.

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  5. *scratches head*

    *thnks I've drank too much*

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  6. Like with apparating? (I think that's what Miss Rowling calls it)

    Anyway happy holidays! -and so you are to blame for my missing presents?

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  7. Well, Skillz, they start off looking as they did when they died, then it's up to them if they want to change. Most, however, are too stupid to realise that they can, so drift around as an ugly fart for the rest of eternity. I do wish they'd read the leaflet properly when they die - it would save the rest of us from being greeted by their hideous visages when we visit the astral plane.

    What are you talking about? Of course it was the same broom. Trigger had a picture to prove it... Heh heh heh!

    P&T: We'll have no 'thnk'ing here, thank you very much. Only drinking. Yay!

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  8. Ooh, 'Pete, you snuck in there when I wasn't looking - you must be good! Sorry about the Father Christmas impaling. He might be OK for next year...

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  9. Ether your dead or your not.

    I'm drunk so I'm nether.

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  10. nether?

    You pissed-up cunt!

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  11. I to can close my eyes and watch the world in my head like live TV.

    Look at that body.

    Mmmm, maybe I'm just day dreaming

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  12. P&T, SID had to say 'nether', otherwise it wouldn't rhyme with his drunken, but amusing, play on words 'Ether your dead or your not.' But you could've put in the apostrophe and 'e', SID, you drunken queynte!

    I_B: Was it female? I hope the young hussy had some clothes on or I'm sure it would've been a nightmare.

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