Eek! What in Jebus am I doing?

I don't know how you humans work these infernal machines. Don't you need at least another ten percent of your brain working? Or two more fingers?

I'm on the verge of giving up. Which would be a shame as I've got some intriguing gossip about my sister, Indescribable DeVice. That'll have to wait until another time. At least until I get the hang of this... this... Machine!

Phew... This is more taxing than I anticipated.