Monday 17 April 2017

Game of Porcelain Thrones


 Oog.  There's a reason I haven't been around much this Easter: Food poisoning!

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 On Thursday, Inexcuseable and I prepared a birthday tea for The Father (it was his birthday on Wednesday, but we were both at work late on the day). It was a bit of a rush job, as I was out with Indescribable all afternoon house hunting (some of the larger ones can get up quite a clip, and the smaller ones are a bugger for finding once they've gone to ground) - she's looking for a place up here on the coast as she's got a new job. 
 When we got back to Castlette DeVice, I bunged a load of potatoes in the oven to bake, then set about decorating the cake I'd made that morning. Meanwhile, Indescribable returned to The Parents' to collect them, The Little Witch (née Babyzilla) and Babyzooky. Inexcuseable then arrived to sort out all the trappings to go with the potatoes (cheese, tuna, salad etc.) and try and wake her husband (who'd been at work since ridiculous-o'clock and, upon returning, immediately fell into a sleep deep enough to inspire a maleficent fairy spurned from a royal christening, or something).

The view west from the clifftop at Trimingham - That's Sidestrand in the distance. Indescribable and I looked at a couple of houses near here.

Mind your step!

 
 Anyway, having so many family members in a small space went surprisingly well (I should have known something would go wrong). After tea, cake, coffee and mints, we kicked everyone out, breathed a sigh of relief, and went to bed.

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 I was rudely awakened at four in the morning by Inexcuseable loudly throwing up in the bathroom. I heaved myself out of bed, staggered down to the east wing and was assured that she was OK and it was nothing to do with the rapidly growing parasite foetus lodged in her womb. I got her some water while she continued to blow chunks, then I returned to my pit.
 I woke again at about eight, sauntered downstairs upon hearing Inexcuseable on the phone to The Parents - They'd been up since the early hours hurling their guts up, too! I got halfway down when my stomach churned violently so I raced back up to the bathroom yelling "Me too!". Strangely, neither Indescribable nor her two little cowbags darlings suffered. Not so strangely, Inexcuseable's husband didn't suffer either as he couldn't be roused from his slumber and slept through the meal, the evening, the night, and his wife's spewgusting!
After a lot of deliberating, cogitating and digesting, we've narrowed the suspect down to something salad related - possibly the lamb's lettuce, or green potatoes (which at least one of us would have noticed, so we've kind of ruled the potatoes out)? Although, it could be the mayonnaise? And I can't find my little jar of black nightshade anywhere...

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 Well, I spent all of Good Friday (hah!) alternately in bed and atop the porcelain throne. By Saturday, I was half a stone lighter, but managing to keep down water and sweet mint tea (and, by evening, grissini breadsticks). Sunday saw the daring reintroduction of more adventurous solids to my diet (apricot jam on toast, more breadsticks, beans on toast, and a very small piece of chocolate cake - which I didn't finish). 
And then, this morning I felt fine, so I ventured out to potter around in the garden. I also thinned out my wardrobe and, this afternoon, popped down to the beach for some bracing sea air and exercise.

What?! You didn't think I was going to show you the contents of my porcelain throne, did you?

The Forties Sentinel

Gah! Sun!

Cumulus and cirrus clouds

17 comments:

  1. Oh you poor baby! And glad you're better in time to go back to work.
    Perhaps taking that dead shark home for tea wasn't such a good suggestion of mine?
    You would be better off at the Bull Ring: one stall proudly advertises the man's Live Crabs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, you can keep your good ideas to yourself next time! I can't believe I'm well again in time for work.

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    2. Well I've been wanting to make nettle soup for years but was put off by someone telling me you have to pick off just the tops of the nettles - too high for dogs to have peed on them.
      Then I saw someone walking a mastiff along the path where the nettles grew and knew it would never happen.
      Nature is so cruel sometimes - especially in the way she mysteriously makes people ill in their holidays.

      Delete
  2. Sorry to hear that you and your family were poisoned. Mayo may be the culprit, definitely a dangerous delicatesse.
    I can very well related to the sleeping man, I slept one time for twelve hours (Frayday to Saturday) and last night for more than ten hours. Body & brain need it, so they take it.
    Get well soon, desinfect all surfaces.

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    Replies
    1. I was surprised how easily I was able to sleep, Mago. But, I suppose, having no energy would assist in that.

      We've ruled out the mayonnaise as both Inexcuseable and her husband have both had it since with no explosive comeuppances.

      Delete
  3. Oh, dear. What a retched thing to happen. I would also guess spoiled mayo.

    Best wishes to all for a speedy recovery.

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    Replies
    1. All better now, thank you LẌ. Although still none the wiser as to the culprit now that mayo has been ruled out.

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  4. Replies
    1. Do you know, I've never actually seen it?! Obviously I am well aware of it and have seen snippets and clips, but I just haven't got around to watching it. I must remedy this appalling situation!

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    2. You will definitely enjoy it! Jx

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  5. bung a potato? do you wear a rubber?

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  6. Happy Belated Birthday to the Father! And Congrats to Inexcuseable and husband/Sleeping Beauty on the upcoming (or should that be out borrowing) new addition.

    It sucks to get food poisoning, feeling awful and losing recreation time. Well, silver lining, you're thinner! And you can have more confidence should you decide to strut the beautiful beaches in an itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini! Weather and local law permitting, of course.

    Get well soon! Here's to hoping you can eat two slices of chocolate cake by the end of the week!

    P.S. The green cliff tops look gorgeous!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, dear. Now I'm going to have to find something else to distract Mago, again!

      Despite feeling right as rain again, I still can't bring myself to eat the remaining chocolate cake. There must still be something wrong...

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  7. "Can't find find mt little jar of nightshade..." Oopsie!
    As a completely related aside...I have a chocolte(Ycch milk-type) bunny up for grabs. Anyone?

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, but no chocolate for me. Yet.
      If no one else takes up your offer, you could always "Fatal Attraction" it, then mix it up with a bit of golden syrup, crushed biscuits, dried fruit, and nuts, then chill in time for afternoon tiffin?

      Delete

Tickle my fancy, why don't you?