Wednesday 9 September 2015

The Worst Witches


 I thought I'd just pop in with a quick status report. I'm including both my sisters in this as I don't want you to think that it's just me who is finding this witching lark to be a tad taxing at the moment.

• Indescribable - A rubbish Wicked Stepmother. I mean, she actually gets on with her three step-children, and even took one of them camping (yeeuch!) along with Babyzilla!

• Inexcuseable - A non-mad Cat Lady. Despite a promising childhood, Inexcuseable has stubbornly shown innate skills of common-sense and level-headedness, and has never had more than three cats at any one time. Plus, she's coherant, bathes regularly and never throws her cats at people.

• And myself - A witch of such bad timing and memory, that I've neglected to push kids into ovens on numerous occasions; and I keep forgetting to be "busy" refurbishing Castlette DeVice with gingerbread, marzipan, and the like, whenever Mum-Ra and Dad-Ra (aka The Parents) want me to decorate their house. Consequently, I'm not finding much time to skip around your blogs and be sociable, and my home is being slowly devoured by the neighbourhood children.


Bugger.



P.S. Remember that it'll be the 2015 Tinfoil Hat Competition soon, so make sure you're stocked up with foil. I'll probably announce the compo at the weekend.

P.P.S. And just so you know, at least one of your number has already furnished me with their Tinfoil Hat (and accoutrements) compo submission, so you'd better get those tinfoil thinking caps on!

14 comments:

  1. wait, hold on, WTF? did i miss an announcement about the competion? how did someone submit already? what's the topic/theme/raison d'etre this year? :-)

    thank you for stopping by, sweetpea! i do know that spider-man will appear for a price ;) xoxoxoxo

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    1. Calm down, dear Savvy. You haven't missed the compo for the third time! I've just been posting gentle reminders that there will be another compo this year for the blog's 10th anniversary. Which is in October, so I'll be opening the compo this weekend, I think. I'll be sure to drop by yours to let you know when it's on in case I don't see you around here.

      I hope Spider-Man can be paid in cake as I have no money?! Thor, on the other hand, will be paid in other means...

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  2. Oh shit, there had better be more than one entry to the competition. That's the trouble with the Pagan Community (moan, moan, etc). Although I would have to admit the nuclear family does serve an important function: that fission can be useful in distributing magnolia over the anaglypta. My phone tried to correct that last word to 'anally'. Hmmmm.

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    1. Well, look on the bright side, Hound: If no one else submits a tin foil entry, you will have won!

      I'm not sure how The Parents would feel about having their anaglypta replaced by anal? Actually, I don't think they'd care as long as it was done to a professional standard!

      P.S. Lovely word, 'anaglypta'. Lovely!

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    2. Lincrusta, that's all I have to say to you...

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    3. Ooh! Timeless elegance since 1877! Shame it sounds like something one would find in a promiscuous teenager's undercrackers.

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    4. And I see one roll of it costs £160 online. Obviously poor teens selling their used - ahem - undercrackers.

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  3. Replies
    1. As usual, your words of wisdom are succinct and to the point, Norma. Just what I need to knock the rising feelings of desparation on the head. Well, that and by watching reruns of Desperate Housewives!

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  4. Maybe this yard sign will hold the little house-munchers at bay!

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    1. Ooh, I like it! Perhaps we can get Ms Scarlet to update the font/typeface?

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    2. Oh you wait!! I have huge, HUGE plans for the compo!!! Hats, signs, gilding the lilies...sigh... and a winner's acceptance speech to end all acceptance speeches...
      SX

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  5. I must admit I did nibble on your marzipans.........

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Tickle my fancy, why don't you?