Wednesday, September 09, 2009

Something something: Answer

During an unexpected lull at work today, I found myself sifting through ancient emails and I found this meme. It's one I discovered years ago at Tornwordo's not long after I first started blogging. I copied it and emailed it to a few friends then lost it amongst hundreds of non-work related emails. This afternoon, it made a triumphant return!
I've left my (the Host's) original answers in place (in white) so you can see what I was like back in 2005, and reanswered some of them as of now. Enjoy!

1) My mother once: turned me upside down and smacked my back to stop me choking on a mint imperial.

2) Never in my life: have I french kissed a girl. Or done anything else to a girl for that matter.

3) When I was five: it was 1980/1.

4) High school was/is: not very memorable.

5) I will never forget: that I am short sighted.

6) I once met: Pam St.Clement (Pat from Eastenders) when she came to the cafe where I worked in my teens. I made her a fried egg sandwich - glam, eh? Jonathan Del Arco, AKA Hugh Borg, in a lift in Leicester.

7) There's this person I know who: is the most ham-fisted cow I've ever met. You know who you are :)

8) Once, at a bar: I found a fiver.

9) By noon I'm usually: starving.

10) Last night I: had a quiet night in, bathing and reading. Actually, I did last night, too. I'm nothing if not predictable, it seems.

11) If only I had: immortality.

12) Next time I go to church/temple: I'll try not to burst into flames as I cross the threshold.

13) Terri Schiavo: Who? I still have no idea who she is.

14) I like: standing outside in the rain (as long as I'm not going anywhere).

15) When I turn my head left, I see: ivory woodchip. A wardrobe.

16) When I turn my head right, I see: a dining room in need of a make over. Out of the window to the trees encircling the park opposite our house.

17) You know I'm lying when: you catch me out.

18) In junior school: I tickled a boy so much that he wet himself.

19) If I was a character written by Shakespeare: I'd be very surprised.

20) By this time next year I: hope I've done something to change my life. I hadn't, of course. Still haven't unless one counts meeting SP.

21) A better name for me would be: The Boy Who Wished His Life Away.

22) I have a hard time understanding: how people can be so thoughtless.

23) If I ever go back to school, I'll: stick out like a sore thumb.

24) You know I like you if: I spend time with you by choice.

25) If I won an award, the first person I'd thank would be: whoever supported me doing whatever it was that got me the award.

26) I hope that: I don't end up found three weeks later half eaten by alsations. As long as SP lasts the distance, this one shouldn't come to pass.

27) Take my advice: don't jump to conclusions.

28) My ideal breakfast is: one brought to me in bed by a half naked, sexy man - step forward Connor Trinneer. Or Jake Gyllenhaal/Eddie Cibrian/Seann William Scott etc... Oh, or SP.

29) A song I love but do not have is: Biology by Girls Aloud. Of course, being a fabulous Gayer, I own it now. A song I still don't have is: Liza Minelli's Losing My Mind. Perhaps I'm not so fabulous after all?

30) If you visit my hometown, I suggest: you come and see me.

31) Tulips, character flaws, microchips and track stars: bulbs, intriguing, complicated and athletic.

32) Why won't anyone: do? what I say immediately!

33) If you spend the night at my house: I'll let you use the guest towels.

34) I'd stop my wedding: when the Rohypnol wears off and I realise what's going on. If SP pulls his face off revealing himself to be a muck monster from Mordo.

35) The world could do without: greed and intolerance.

36) I'd rather lick the belly of a roach than: burn to death. Again.

37) My favourite thing is: being outside on a really windy day and imagining the wind carrying me off.

38) Paper clips are more useful than: people give them credit for.

39) And by the way: when I say No, I mean it!

40) The last time I was (really) drunk: I ran around in my red pants! And I haven't been hideously pissed since that half-naked night.

41) My grandmother always: is. Used to say "Pig!" after she'd unleashed an enormous burp.

And there you have it. Now for the tags (if you can be arsed): Tim, Dinah, Eros, Beast and 'Petra. Knock yourselves out!


  1. Yay! First!

    I'm pleased to see the word 'Pig' in there, albeit near the end.

    I love grannies.

  2. Hmmm … number 18 probably explains a lot about number 2 (not the pant-wetting bit, rather the fact you were tickling the boys).

    33 - would that be because my clothes would all have mysteriously disappeared in the hope of fulfilling no. 28?

    I might actually bother to do this when I get a mo'.

  3. Looks like fun. I'll start working on all 40 something questions.

    7) There's this person I know who: is the most ham-fisted cow I've ever met. You know who you are :)

    I got confused: Does this person have fists the size of hams? Or do they just like to get fisted with hams? (Is it Piggy?)

    I have no clue who Terri Schiavo is either: a person, place, or thing?

    I too enjoy the rain--perfect for running and spinning and dancing...

  4. I've only read as far as number two and ALREADY I have something to say...

    2) Never in my life: have I french kissed a girl. Or done anything else to a girl for that matter.

    You can sniff my avatar!

    I'll be back after I've made the blog rounds. I just got home.

  5. 23) If I ever go back to school, I'll: stick out like a sore thumb.

    No, your THUMBS will stick out like sore thumbs.

  6. Great idea to have updated your original answers. Fun stuff!

  7. Such great answers! (wait, is 'answers' Brit slang for something dirty? It probably is.

    I also thought that thought about your thumbs.

  8. Aww poor boy (who wet himself). Were you being mean or was this some love affair gone horribly wrong?

  9. P&T: Yay! Ninth!

    Next time I'll try and put the pig in near the beginning.

    Tim: re 28 & 33: Perhaps you'd better come and stay so we can find out?

    Eros: It does sound like Piggy, but actually she has very dainty hands.

    MJ: Urrgh! I don't like whiskey.

    My thumbs are wriggling in horror.

    Snooze: Ta! I might try and find some more ancient emails/memes as this seems to be so popular.

    Dinah: Blasphemy! Who would have thought such horrors could spill from the lips of an innocent. Do you need to be exorcised?

    'Petra: Naw. No affair, just meaness! I knew he had a weak bladder and that tickling set it off.

  10. Wow I can't imagine you being a bully like that.

    Funny, sure but still mean


Tickle my fancy, why don't you?