The Infomaniac Garden Photos Event 2022 Announcement

The House of

I N F O M A N I A C

Garden Photos Event 2022

 

will be held again here later in the year

(unless any of you fancy having a go at hosting, that is)

 You know, this might be the earliest announcement for the Infomaniac Garden Photos Event ever published?  If I could be arsed I'd do some research to check, but I can't, so you'll just have to go along with it.  Unless you'd like to check for yourselves, of course?

 Anyway, as I've treated myself to a day off work and have got shit all else to blog about, I have taken The Very Mistress's advice (command? order?) and come up with this primer for this year's Event, complete with photos of the pre-Spring blooms here at Hexenhäusli Device!

. . .

  Oh, before we go any further, here's a musical accompaniment to your downward scrolling: The Procession of Celestial Beings, composed by Joe Hisaishi and performed by the New Japan Philharmonic World Dream Orchestra (from The Tale of Princess Kaguya - which I watched the other day).

. . .

A Saucy Deviation

 In an effort to continue the blogging impetus that I started last week, may I present a slight deviation from that of Ms Scarlet's original ketchup-based post. This post has a high Star Trek content, so you may be pleased to find that it is mercifully brief...

Sketches:  For a while now I've had an idea to illustrate a scene from the backstory I worked up for the Star Trek map that I created back in 2019.  As I don't have an art project on the go right now, I started sketching...

Here we have a Daughter of the Fifth House with her Yehtee assistant

(and a cartoonish interloper) disembarking the Royal Yacht

And here are some quick passes at the yacht

inspired by batjorge's Quantum Projection.

Snippets: "Every morning he'd arrive at work, ascend the steps to his cubicle and strip down to his trunks."

 

Screenshots:

 Two years on from the last playing card reveal in a Star Trek production, comes glimpses of another deck - in this case, from a game of Leonian poker in Star Trek: Discovery (which I'm not watching, by the way - I didn't much care for the last season, and this one's on yet another streaming service that I'm just not going to sign up for.  Well, until Star Trek: Strange New Worlds with the yummy Anson Mount/Captain Christopher Pike starts later this year, that is).  

 It was the Arcadian Queen that got my attention - as seen on Star Trek fan, Jörg Hillebrand's twitter account, here.  Arcadians are very seldom seen aliens who first appeared in Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (the one with the whales) - which is where the third screenshot comes from.  I can feel the need to make some of these cards, just as I did with the Romulan pikhmit/pixmit cards here.

[Screenshots from Cygnus-X1 and Trekcore]

 

Sounds:

"Tilted" by Christine and the Queens. 

 I discovered this thanks to The Great British Sewing Bee.  A small part - "I'm doing my face with magic marker" - was playing during the modelling of one of Raph's creations in series 7.

 A blast-from-the-past that I'm listening to as I type this is "I Wish I Cared" by a-ha.

𝄇𝄆

 And that's it.  I aim to be back by this time next week in some form or other.  Have a good week!

Sunday Ketchup - IDV's Copy/Paste Edition

 I've realised that I'm in danger of never blogging ever again unless I do something NOW!  So, taking a leaf out of Ms Scarlet's book - almost literally, and with her permission (kind of) - here's my quick-and-dirty, copy-and-paste Sunday Ketchup. 

From Ms Scarlet's 5th December Sunday Ketchup post: 

"Sunday Ketchup. It will be a random account of my week and will include quotes from my journal [my very secret journal that I show no-one ever!]; photographs; collages; calligraphy; and, of course, the obligatory piece of Sunday music. How thrilled you must be to read of my good intentions. Again. Let us proceed…"

 My week - nay, my weeks - since my last post have been spent continuing the dither that engulfed me at the start of the year.  It's got to the point where I've become a passive observer rather than an active participant, which means I've barely done anything of note at all.

 I haven't produced any calligraphy of course, but I did spend 10-15 minutes making a £999,960 Bank of Bungle bank note for my sister Indescribable's birthday earlier in the week.  She wanted a million pounds so I topped up the £40 John Lewis voucher I got for her with this:

Spot the mistake (which I corrected after I took this photo)...
 

 In my very secret journal I wrote: A rescue - from [a spiral in(g) time] - a survivor, Galuth Nym, an old woman who should be young.

 From my emails I wrote: Thanks very much for sorting Car out. Again. I’m sure it won’t be the last time – unless I get a new car sooner rather than later...

 Photograph of the week: 

Taken for an art project that never took off...
 

 A tune that I discovered yesterday and have listened to rather a lot: "Impossible" by Röyksopp & Alison Goldfrapp

 

In fact, I'm listening to it now...

 Right.  I'd best be off as there's loads to do before I can lounge about in the bath for a couple of hours this evening.  Plus, I need to do the catch up with all of you that I didn't do last time.

P.S. I love all your comments in the last post.  Carry on! 

EDIT 20:40 - P.P.S. For a birthday I usually forget... (not mine, although I did shoot this on my birthday 12 years ago)

Fart in a Colander

 Sorry I haven't been around much lately - I've been in a bit of a dither this past few weeks what with one thing and another.  "Like a fart in a colander" (that doesn't know which hole to get out of), as my Grandma used to put it.

 I can't quite put my finger on what's brought it on, but I suspect that a combination of things are to blame, including more Car related woes (it's in the garage again!).  I have taken up swimming (in a pool, not the sea) though, which seems to be taking the edge off, somewhat.

 Oh, the inclusion of the Parsnip People (from my allotment) up there will become apparent if you keep reading.

::

 New music: I've been surprised by White Lies latest release "Am I Really Going To Die".  That's three in a row from them that I've taken to.  I'm not usually a fan of their music as it aways seems too maudlin and ernest for my liking, but this one is quite bright and pop-y with some rather exhilarating bits (I haven't really listened to the words, so it's probably really miserable).

 Also, I'm getting sick of the lead singer's glum, beardy face singing at me/the camera.

::

Come One, Come All, to the Freakin' Green Elf Shorts Ball!

Should anyone have been off-planet this past week, please be aware that the

Freakin' Green Elf Shorts Caption Competition

is now on over at Ms Scarlet's place!

 The artfully put together scene above (complete with new sofa - Ms Scarlet has spared no expense!) is what you have to work with.  All you need to do is visit Ms Scarlet's FGES blog post, leave a cunning caption (or twelve) and cross your fingers that it's amusing enough to win. 

 If you are that fortunate winner, Ms Scarlet will package up the 'Shorts and send them your way so you can hold a caption competition of your own and send them on to your winner.  The Freakin Green Elf Short's quest for world domination (not to be confused with The Very Mistress's World Domination Tours) is in your hands arse/nether regions!

This version of the Freakin' Green Elf Shorts Travel Map will soon be replaced by new map.  I hope!

 The 'Shorts need to be removed from Ms Scarlet's clutches and away from this green and pleasant brown and muddy land forthwith, as the effects of a second bout of Post-Shorts Syndrome are only going to be more prolonged and difficult to treat the longer she holds on to them.  As Hunter Elf Thompson (from Fear and Loathing in the Loo) once said, "There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a [wo]man in the depths of a polyester binge." (Thank you for the quote, Rimpy) 

 Speaking of Rimpy, for further information about the 'Shorts, please visit his exhaustively researched Continuing History of the Freakin' Green Elf Shorts post.

 You have until Saturday 16th 15th January to enter (as many times as you like), and the winner will be crowned on Sunday 16th.  Happy captioning, and good luck!

Next week you'll all be mush!

 Well, 2022 has arrived without incident - although it is unseasonably warm - and in my desperation to post something in order to drag my Sideboard out of 2021, may I present the dawn of 2022 from here in Overstrand:

☙❧

The Year of the Invaded Sideboard

 What a year it's been!

 Animal rescue.

 Poor Tim...

 Floods.

 Poor Ms Nations...

 The return of ABBA.

 Poor ABBA...  

 Someone had a bit of a cough.

 . . .

 . . .

 . . .

 Well?

 Oh, er... Poor BEAST.  

 And aside from everything else, our poor Sideboard took quite a pummelling.  Having seen off an expanse of pink [thank you, Dinah] and a giant old lady [also by Dinah] in previous years, 2021 has seen no less than five invasions!  

 But before we get to those, a quick heads-up about this year's Coven Awards: Unlike previous years, there aren't any awards per se, rather a selection of bits & bobs from your blogs throughout the year that we enjoyed, appreciated, or just remembered to make a note of at the time.

 The remembered bit is key.  Our memory is pretty terrible, so these aren't neccessarily the best bits, just noted or remembered bits.

 Oh, and there's much less self-indulgence from us, too.

 Although there is some, of course:  Star Trek.  Men we like.  Sofas that we think are ghastly (not your new one, Ms Scarlet - we haven't seen it yet...)  It's our blog, after all.

 Quite.  Anyway, let's get on with it before the dratted SubCs realise we've started without them.

 Ooh, yes!  On with the show, and the Sideboard Invasions:

  The first, in January, was by professional sideboard invader, Dinahmow, with an enormous luna astronaut complete with narrowboat (naturally).

 Let's start with a little Music, shall we?  Introduced to us by Jon (of course), this has become one of my most played pieces this year: Let's Danzón - Gustavo Dudamel at the Proms Arturo Márquez Danzón Nº 2 

 

Dance : Jon attempted to prise Colin's Anusol from the grip of-  Oh.  Sorry.  I misheard.  It's Prisencolinensinainciusol as we discovered here: Motivi per essere allegri. 

"Aunty Anne just gobbed at us."

 It's almost the end of the year, so here are most of the things I've read, watched and listened to since my last update back in September.  Unfortunately, I don't have much time to spend on this as I need all the time I can get to work on the end-of-year roundup (which I've barely begun - Eeeek!).

Read

⌑  Light from Uncommon Stars (2021), by Ryka Aoki - I read this to learn more about trans people and because the premise sounded bonkers (cursed violins and alien-replicated donuts, anyone?), and also because it was likened, in style and feeling, to Becky Chambers' (one of my favourite authors) novels.  The descriptions and world-building were good - everything came alive easily in my head - and it felt clean and comfortable (despite some horrible transphobia and ignorance-fueled violence suffered by Katrina, one of the main characters).  Secondary characters seemed to get short shrift, though (Lan Tran's family in particular) - I didn't feel I got to know them, they just did things.  Overall, I rather liked it, but probably won't revisit it.

⌑  White Trash Warlock (2020), by David R. Slater - This one I read because of this part of the description in the Tor review: "This is no Chosen One narrative—this is a regular guy, who just happens to have a bit of magic, trying to do his best in life."  Although I quite liked it, I probably won't go back to this one (or any sequels) either.

⌑  Little, Big (1981), by John Crowley - I'm only about a fifth of the way through (if that), and I'm finding it hard-going (it's not an easy read like the previous two novels), but it is quite fascinating.

ReRead

⌑   The Indispensible Calvin and Hobbes, by Bill Watterson - Just a delight, as always.

[strip via]

IDV's [redacted] Winterval Panto! (Part 2)

Continued from... IDV's Wonderful Winterval Panto! (Part 1)

No.  I'm not doing anymore narrating.

You'll have to get someone else to do it.

But, Very Mistress...

No!  There was more to do than you led me to believe,

and having to do it all in italics as well is too much!

Well, who else can I get on such short notice?

Who hasn't had a part yet?  Ms Nations?  Rimpy?  Melanie?

I bet Upton would be very good? 

Americans?!  Has that Jameson's gone to your head already?

The Great British public won't have bloody Americans

narrating a panto!  No. They can be the Audience.

You snob!  Well, what about Mago, then?  He's just had

his eyes done so reading the script will be a good test.

And Dobbin's not really in this part, so he's free.

Mago...?  Hmmm... Yes.  Mago!

High above the land in a castle floating amongst the clouds, lived a giant.

In diesem Moment in the castle's great hall, the giant was enjoying a breakfast of Ferrero Rocher freshly laid by his golden goose foil-covered droid while being half-heartedly seranaded by his golden robot harp.  The castle's Very Mistress, Fetchsleep, was ensconced in her fainting web, trying - und failing - to get a bit of shut-eye...

 

 "Ah, isn't Jack beautiful?  I just want to eat him all up!  When do you think he'll get here?"

 "Sigh... I really couldn't say - I'm not the one sat in front of the crystal ball!  And when I said no more narrating, I didn't mean for you to cast me in the story instead.  I need my beauty sleep to be ready for legions of punters once I don the Infomaniac Mistletoe Belt Buckle.  So, has he discovered the Cobaeanstalk?"

 "No, not yet.  I've been watching him for hours and haven't even caught a glimpse of his maypole yet!"

 "I'm not surprised - It is December, after all.  What's he doing now, then?  Like I care..."

 "It looks like he's lolling about in bed.  Or riding some sort of sea monster?  It's difficult to tell as the picture in the 'ball isn't very clear."

 "Well, wake me when something interesting happens."

 "Righto.  Golden Harp?  This music is a bit lacklustre - can you play something else, please?  And nothing Christmassy."

 "Oh, 'play something else' he says!  If only it was that easy.  Where are my muses, hmm?  Where are all the big, dumb, muscular lunks to stimulate my creativity?  Oh, that's right - you ate them!  If you want me to play with myself and pluck my own strings, then I'll need the stimulus to do so.  'Play something else' indeed.  Easy for you to say having swallowed all my men.  I don't know why I bother?!  Golden Tinfoil Goose droid agrees with me, don't you?"

 "Beep boop."

IDV's Wonderful* Winterval Panto! (Part 1**)

* lit. full of wonder at how this travesty of cliches, assumptions, and lazy writing came into being.

** Fortunately for you, there are only two parts to this.

 

Continued from A Pink Prelude...

 

... And for that 'Grotbags' comment I can do the narrating

reclined on my fainting chaise in the wings?

For the last time: Yes!

Good.  I can't be arsed with navigating shoddily constructed scenery while flouncing about in ridiculous costumes - I've seen what's in store for Jon in wardrobe.

I just want a bit of a lie down with a drink.  Or twelve.

There's a barrel of Jameson's and a straw all set out back.

Now, if you would kindly take your place?

Script!  Where's my script?

Christ!  It's on the chaise!

Please, Very Mistress, the cast - your Infomaniac Drinking Team - and audience are getting restless.

All right.  Keep your knickers on, IDV!

Just remember who you're talking to.

Yes, Very Mistress.

Right.  The narrator is all set.  Places everyone!

Curtain up in five, four, three...

 

In a lightly thronged rural village marketplace-

 

Can half a dozen people be classified as a 'throng'?

Some of them don't even appear to be real people.  Are they cardboard cut-outs?

Of course they're made of cardboard, Very Mistress.

You know the budgets for these things are practically non-existent.

Well, we did have the budget for Savvy to appear in person here,

but she's late as usual, so that's 25 quid down the drain...

We haven't got time for that now!

Very Mistress, if you could continue narrating, please?

Oh.  Yes.  Where was I?  Ah, yes:

In a lightly thronged marketplace we find a young woman- 

Man!

Man?  Is he?  [squints]  Oh, yes, of course.

I forgot that in panto the principle boy is usually played by a female actor.

If we can get on, please?

Just before I do, the script says "a young man" - how young is that then?  20s?  30s?

I only ask because - and I'm not saying that I think she's too...

experienced for the role - isn't that Ms Scarlet?

[sigh] Yes.  It is.  Fortunately, as I'm sure you remember, Ms Scarlet is at least ten years younger here over the Cusp than her birth certificate would have you believe, thanks to that time-travel nincompoopery that occurred over her birthday earlier this year.

Now, if you please?

Of course.  Of course.  Where were we?

Oh, yes, 'thronged marketplace', 'young man':

Anyway, his name is Jack and he's here with his overbearing - and rather garishly dressed, if you ask me - mother, a Dame of some repute, to sell various mud-based artisinal products and some dubious beauty treatments made from butter...

A Pink Prelude...

Continued from... The I.T. Wizard of Oz and

The Calamities of the Carmine Quill (part 4)

 

Vworp  Vworp  Vworp

 As the Great Glass Elevator containing Norma-D2 and C3-Peenee faded from view, Mistress Maddie and IDV surfaced from the frothing gincuzzi.

 "Did you hear something?"

 "No.  And neither did you, so come on" Maddie said dragging IDV down again, the two of them disappearing beneath the spume-laden surface.

R E I N I T I A L I S I N G . . .

 "Oh, no" I muttered resurfacing, spitting a bow-tie from between my teeth - where did that come from?  "Not again.  Not now!" 

 

R E I N I T I A L I S A T I O N   C O M P L E T E.

S T O R Y   C H A N G E   I N   T H R E E . . .

 "What?  What's going on?" Maddie spluttered. 

 "The story's reinitialising!"

 

T W O . . .

 

 "So?"

 "So?!  So, I haven't quite got around to writing the next bit, yet!  If it doesn't have a new story to latch onto, the reinitialisation will flail around picking up any old bits of narrative that've been left laying around!"

 

O N E . . .

 

 "Well, I don't see that it'll be any different from any of your other efforts then, Tootes?"

 "Hmmph!"

 

M A R K.

 

A thrilled IDV

(not in shot, Maddie & Asriel)

 Like Venus rising from the waves - albeit it with more stubble - Asriel emerged from the foaming gincuzzi, a look of confusion on his face.  "Where...?  Where am I?"  The confusion turned to mild panic.  "Where are my clothes?!  And my bow-tie?!?!"

 "Oh!" I exclaimed.  "Maybe this won't turn out so badly after all?"

 Maddie clearly agreed as she assisted in pulling Asriel under, the faint grin of realisation that appeared on his lips was followed into the foam by his trademark raised eyebrow...

Soon to be 399...

 Sorry I haven't been around much over the past couple of weeks or so.  Amongst other things, I had some bad news last month that's affected me more than I thought it would.  It was something that I've known was coming for a while now, but I just thought I'd have another couple of years or so before it became real.  Unfortunately, Car is seriously ill, and is not expected to make it beyond the end of 2022.

A frosty Car from back in January

 Car went in for its MOT in the middle of November, and I knew my purse wouldn't get through unscathed.  I'd had a bad feeling about Car for most of this year, and even considered getting a new car back in September, but my optimism - buoyed on by my superb procrastinatory skills and a hefty dose of denial - won out.  Which meant that come MOT time, I submitted Car for the roadworthiness test, stubbornly forseeing a rose-tinted, birds & butterflies (yes, even at that time of year - I saw a peacock butterfly at the beginning of this month, no less), happy ending - possibly involving the doe-eyed young mechanic who had seen to Car previously.