Thursday, August 15, 2013

Top 10 Searches, or: Battle of the Bulges!


In response to MJ's Top 10 Searches post, here are the top 10 not-quite-as-depraved search keywords of all time (in reverse order) that led people (and I use the term in the loosest possible term) to Inexplicable DeVice (the blog, not myselves):

10. Manticore
 Manticore infested biscuit tins must be more common than I thought?
"Ooh, I could murder a custard cream!"

9. Olympic bulges
 This must have something to do with Dinah or that chapeau de tin-foil created by Eros.


 









8. Connor Trinneer bulge
 This could be from any of a number of Trinneer-based posts - more down below (fnar fnar)!
"Bah! No one can see
my abs in this top."
7. Chris Pine naked
 See the number one visited post at Inexplicable DeVice in the section below
"Are you stalking me again, IDV?"

6. Ryan Kwanten bulge
 See the number one visited post at Inexplicable DeVice in the section below

5. Alien Queen
They must have been after MJ...

"Hisssssssssssss!"

4. Chris Pine bulge
 See the number one visited post at Inexplicable DeVice in the section below

3. Bulges
 See the number one visited post at Inexplicable DeVice in the section below

2. Jared Padalecki bulge
 See the number one visited po-  Good gods, I'm sick of writing that bloody sentence!

1. Connor Trinneer
 And here he is in all his buff and bulging glory!

"Mmmm... I'm so buff!"
"Wow! You *are* buff!"
"Sigh... And pretty, too."



Gah! I've read and typed the word 'bulge' so many times now that it has lost all meaning and looks ridiculous!

~ ~ ~

And now for the Top 3 visited posts of all time here at Inexplicable DeVice...

3. An unexpected 'guest'
 I have absolutely no idea why this post should have garnered 2,248 visits?

Just smile and look
elegant, Margo.
This nastiness will
soon be over with.
2. 2008 in review
 Well, Connor-in-his-underwear is bound to be a draw! 4,595 people can't be wrong.

"Shit! Here comes IDV again. Better hide."

1. 2009: A review
 So, here it is: The source of the 15,763 'bulge' searches. Take a bow Chris Pine, Ryan Kwanten and Jared Padalecki!



Oh, and Tim, of course!


P.S. I would have posted this on the same day that MJ did hers, but we lost the interwebs here at Castlette DeVice.

10 comments:

Jon DeepBlue said...

And I thought this was a PG-13 blog! You should activate the warning page before someone reports you.

:P
Hugs
Jon

MJ said...

I'm certain "An Unexpected Guest" garnered record numbers of guests for your mention of "incestuous cousins" or "kissing cousins" as they're also known.

I'm suspect that quite a lot of it goes on.

LX said...

Perhaps do a post on "The Battle of the Bulge!"

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Jon: Please accept my sincere apologies if the content has corrupted your pure and innocent mind.

And you lot at the back: Stop sniggering!

MJ: Ah, yes. That'd explain it.

LX: But that would mean doing research, and you should know by now that I'm far too lazy for that!

Unless you mean a battle between Chris Pine's and Connor Trinneer's bulges, then I'm right on it! Or them...

Princess said...

I went searching for a "bulge" once but never found it... seems I'd typed in "bugle" by mistake... I still ended up here tho... go figure...

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Well, Princess deserves a bugle fanfare on arrival!

savannah said...

where does one find out who's "hit their blog" via a search, sugar? xoxoxox

jason said...

Oh, you mean this is not BulgesBulging.com?

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Savvy: Why, on the blog menu page thingy... The dashboard! That's it.
The stats icon is in a column on the left. Just click it for the options (Overview, Posts, Traffic sources & Audience) et voila!

Jason: Sorry, dahling. Try down the hall...

mistress maddie said...

If I'm ever in the market for bulge, now I know where to go!!!